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Accepting18

OUTED for my herpes in the workplace

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So... recently, it was brought to my attention that my herpes status has been made aware to some of my co workers. I have no idea how some of them know, and no idea why my name was discussed in the manner for my status to even come up. I was seeing someone not too long ago, and he was made well aware of my status by ME, and accepting. We were not exclusive, but co workers knew we were seeing each other. This may be my fault for sharing my “happiness” and seeking advice, as they may not have know that we were seeing each other. However, a co worker took it upon her self to drunkenly approach this guy I was seeing, at a bar, and let him know that I have herpes. Not once did this woman come to me to ask or discuss anything, she went straight to him assuming that he did not know about my status (I tell everyone that I am intimate with; everyone, period). I am appalled and highly upset that my health information was even being discussed by people who have no business discussing it, let alone not even verifying the accuracy. Whether or not I have herpes, that is no ones business but mine and the person I am seeing. If she felt that I was being “sneaky” she could have came to me, and I would have of course explained my sexual health is NONE of her business. He called me of course, to let me know what happened, and he swore to me he did not say anything, which I do believe because he’s a pretty private person. I can only guess the information was dispelled by someone I was previously intimate with, and that is extremely disrespectful on so many levels. I am embarrassed, but I stopped to think about “why?” I have done nothing wrong; I shared my status with EVERY necessary party, and did not tell anyone in my workplace my status. I have changed my work schedule to avoid working with the individuals who discussed my personal business, and I have considered going to HR if I hear anything about this at work. I was afraid this would happen to me eventually, if I am being honest, and I see why people choose not to disclose, because people cannot act maturely, and realize that herpes is not something that needs to be stigmatized, or made fun of. I am upset that I can’t even go to work without fear of my medical information being disclosed. It sucks because I’m a good person, and the fact that I’m being defined by my herpes status is one of the most hurtful things I have ever experienced in my life. I chose not to have a mental break down, although I did have a panic attack I when I found out, I realized I have to take care of my daughter, pay my bills, and graduate from college in a few months, I don’t have time to break down. I’m a good person, and the people discussing my information will reap what they sow. For anyone going through an outing in the workplace, personal life (which has also happened to me), I feel your pain deeply, and these next few weeks will be difficult for me, but I’m definitely trying to stay strong, and when I walk into work, I will speak to no one and do my job, and go home, because now I’m just “the girl with herpes” to them, but to my daughter, I’m a loving mother, and to my friends, I’m just me, and that’s all that matters.

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Wow I’m so sorry you have to endure such a thing. People are really disgusting. Ado as you said & continue to go work, you have accomplishments and goals to reach. Smh ridiculous. I’m so mad for you.

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Thank you. I left work early today because of my anxiety, but I’ve also been under the weather with everything going around. I appreciate it though. 

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