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Intercourse causing outbreaks

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I’m not sure if this is a dumb question or not so I apologize if it is lol but for some background, before I had my really bad initial outbreak in April of this year which caused me to get diagnosed with hsv2, I would get little cuts on my vulva after sex. I had actually gone to the dr one time about a year ago because I had what looked like tears on my perineum (which I get every time I have sex and that’s happened for over a year now) and the dr said I just needed to use lubrication and nothing was wrong. I also would get long ulcers that looked like cuts in the creases of my vulva and lips after sex and I was told again just use more lube. But I’m starting to think maybe I’ve had hsv2 for years and had little outbreaks without knowing it before my big initial outbreak in April? Is that possible? And also I had sex last night and this morning, we used a condom, I’m on valcyclovir and I had no signs of an outbreak coming on and I haven’t had an outbreak since my initial one in April so I thought it would be fine, but as soon as we started I felt some pain and then immediately after I noticed that I have ulcers all over, inside, on my vulva, perineum, and even on the outside. Is it possible for the sores to just pop up that quickly? I’m so confused and I’m starting to wonder if I’ll ever have a normal sex life again, I’m a very sexual person and this is really upsetting me a lot and I’m scared I’ll never be able to enjoy sex again. Has anyone had a similar experience and ended up normal again? Or is this my new normal?

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Within the first 6 months to a year, the body is building up antibodies (immunity) to herpes, so intercourse is pretty commonly a trigger for outbreaks, unfortunately. But for the majority of folks after that year mark (depending on a host of factors, including your immune system and how healthy you are) on average those sorts of sensitive triggers tend to settle down more. I wouldn't call this your new normal. Just be patient with yourself during this phase and trust that things will get better. 

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