Just diagnosed and feeling down

[Bubbly120]

Does life get better after being diagnosed? Right now I just feel horrible, ashamed and disgusted with myself.  How did this happen?? I am always so freaking careful. 

[mr_hopp]

Welcome! What you're feeling is totally normal. It's part of the 5 stages of grieving ... which might not take the feelings away, but at least it gives what you're going through some context! (And knowing you aren't going through this alone helps, too! It's a great step that you're already reaching out and talking about it.) Be vigilant around watching your thoughts and consciously choosing the beliefs and identity you are taking on around this diagnosis. Work on strengthening your relationship to yourself instead of being disgusted toward yourself. What you need most now is self-compassion and forgiveness. You get to give yourself that instead of grief. 

Also, there are so many success stories of people not only "moving on" past herpes, but actually living *better lives* than they might have had if not for getting the wakeup call that herpes can give. (I'm certainly one of those people ... happily married with a wonderful 4-year old boy; when I first got herpes I thought this would never be available to me!)

Have you watched this intro video? It's a good place to start: https://www.herpesopportunity.com/post/herpes-facts

And definitely download the e-book and handouts to start reframing this as an opportunity for deeper intimacy (not necessarily the herpes itself, but the deeper opportunity for vulnerability that it provides): https://www.herpesopportunity.com/lp/ebook

[Sarah317]

Just remember... at least I keep telling myself this... NO ONE deserves this. You are not at fault. It’s a medical condition, that’s all.