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Feeling pretty down.

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Currently single and not feeling too great lately. Dating is hard enough but now when I finally do meet a stranger which will probably take forever, I have to tell them about HSV2. I expect that to be quite a problem for me. 

Anyways, I was just hoping that people could drop some facts about HSV2 to cheer me up. Really bummed out 🙁 

I had everything going for me and now I am cursed.

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Aw, please know that your feelings are valid. Healing from herpes takes a different amount of time for everyone. Some people may feel angry, then sad, then apathetic, or none of these or all of these at once. 

There is hope for you ❤️. Such hope. It may feel like with your herpes you carry all the bad luck and memories of your previous relationship, but your herpes and your past relationship are not one in the same. If you can, try and compartmentalize them. For me, I had to separate my herpes from the abusive guy who gave it to me, and that was very very hard. I felt like my herpes was a constant reminder of my past, and it affected me mentally for too long. So, I forgave myself and gave myself the chance to be happy and healed. 

Even though I did get rejected for having herpes numerous times, I reminded myself that it wasn't my fault. I deserved someone who was accepting and kind, not judgmental. No one can make me feel inferior without my consent; if I let something get me down and hold me back, it certainly will. Of course it's normal to feel sad. But don't let that hold you back from living your best life ❤️. You deserve to life your best life ❤️.

Dating and having a wonderful intimate life is 110% possible with HSV-2!! So many people with HSV-2 on this site (including the founder!) have found happy healthy long term relationships, and the same is possible for you!! I promise. In the meantime, radically accept yourself unconditionally even though you have herpes. Herpes is a tiny microscopic PART of you, it is NOT the entirety of who you are. It is important for you to understand this and believe it, just as it is important for a future girlfriend to.

You can do this! We are all cheering you on. 🌄


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Don't let this define you!!!  You are special and worthy of love,  never forget that.   You can and will find someone who will love you regardless.   But you need to love and accept yourself first.   I think that once that happens your entire mindset  changes and you attract positive people.  Keep in mind that you don't have to tell someone about H until you feel intimacy is on the horizon.   Try to just go on dates and get to know someone before you tell them about this.   I waited about a month to tell my guy and we got to just know each other so when I had to tell him I was a bit more comfortable and confident.  It's now been over 2 and a half months and there's no signs of us slowing down.   You can be happy too!  

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I feel you, I was diagnosed just a month ago. I go from feeling hatred and anger, betrayal..you name it..towards who infected me to complete devastation and thinking this is it, how will I ever feel okay with disclosing this awful thing about me. How will anyone ever want to take the chance. I know people say that they meet people that accept it, but I feel it’ll be like finding a needle in a haystack, and all the rejection it’ll take to get there..yeesh, that’s gotta be brutal to your self esteem. 

As bad as the physical pain was, 4 weeks in and yes, it’s gotten quite a bit better but I’m still not completely over it. The emotional pain is so much worse. 

I know where you’re coming from. Realize this response isn’t a positive one but just letting you know I feel the same. I admire the people that can just own it and not let it bring them down, I’m definitely not there yet. Here’s hoping this somehow gets easier to swallow. You’re not alone 🙁

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First, I love your username haha!

Second, I am so sorry for your pain. Please know it gets better, and you can 110% have an amazing relationship future and sex life with herpes. Just forgive yourself, your body, others involved. Promise to unconditionally love and accept yourself, even though you have this virus. 

This virus doesn't determine who you are. The way people may treat you in regards to having herpes is a reflection of them, not you. 

Stay strong!! ❤️ You are not alone 🌻



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  • 4 weeks later...

@Neverwouldathought Hi! I know this can be a difficult time with everything still being relatively new. I've had GHSV1 for 12 years. I didn't just accept it and move right through. It's a process. I was initially devastated and afraid to leave a lifeless marriage (and I contracted it from my ex). I was recently cowardly rejected but through returning to this site, I've been able to remember who I am as a whole human with H and not the summary or stigma that people have around it. I had to remember the people I disclosed to who accepted me and my story and saw me as that whole human. You are not doing this alone, even though it very much feels like you're on an island at times. Do exactly what you did here and reach out 😊. You'll find support and a way to address your thinking so you can get stronger through this. Grieving your H- life is normal. But remember you can live H+ and still be your awesome, powerful, amazing self! You'll find your way.

Best wishes,


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