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confused. how could this have happened?


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I recently was diagnosed. I have a strong marriage and have not been unfaithful. I truly believe my husband has not been either. I dont remember having an initial outbreak. Currently training for a marathon and experienced an outbreak. Im so confused, scared and ashamed. We have been married 9 years and are strong in our faith. Trying to figure out how I got this, if the stress from marathon training caused the dormant virus to rise? So confused. 

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Hello! 

I am so sorry you are experiencing such stress. Please know you are not alone. We are all here to support you ❤️!

Most importantly, remember these truths: You are not dirty. You are not bad. You are not ugly. You are pure. You are good. You are beautiful. 

Herpes is a sassy virus. It lays dormant, and you mentioned, and can pop up randomly, especially due to stress on the body, such as marathon training. Herpes can be asymptomatic, and people may never show symptoms, or mistaken symptoms for an ingrown hair or other dermatological issue. Also, some people may not notice their sores, especially if they in a spot that you don't see, whether internal or external. 

Herpes is a very common virus. It is not inherently bad, society just labeled it as something to be ashamed of, when in reality it's no reason to feel guilty or shame. ❤️

It is wonderful that you are your husband are strong in faith and love ❤️. Don't let assumptions and accusations come between the love you have. Try and focus on the rational truths and gather data. 

Did you get a swab test, or a blood test? Also, which type of HSV is it? What you could do is get a blood test if you haven't; get an IgG to see if you've had HSV for a while. Also, your husband could get a blood test as well. 

If you have HSV-1, and your husband doesn't have/hasn't had a genital outbreak, it is very possible you could have gotten it from receiving oral sex. If your husband has ever had a cold sore or fever blister (typically HSV-1) you could have gotten it this way! This is an increasingly common transmission route.

I hope this helps! Stay strong and be kind to yourself. It will be okay ❤️. Use the love you have as a blanket and let it protect you from those sassy lies and doubts! You are beautiful ❤️.

Sending blessings your way 🌄!

-- Grace

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