Anxious thoughts of next outbreak

[Thebiglobowski]

Hi, im not sure if anyone still goes in this forum, but boy I can't stop thinking about how anxious and paranoid I am about having a possible next outbreak. How do you guys deal with it? I've had it for 2 years almost 3, and have only had one initial outbreak that wasn't too bad. I keep telling myself it's ok and I'm fine, and I have my antiviral ready if it happens, but it's just so scary. I'm in a loving relationship and did talk to him once about it, but only just the one time because I haven't had another outbreak so it hasn't been a problem. But I still feel so anxious and scared and paranoid. How does one deal with these thoughts? I don't know why it's all I think about 

[Flowerteacher55]

Hello,

I hope you are well. 

I am so sorry that you are anxious and scared. It is exhausting to have that fear looking in the back of our mind. It is distracting and takes away from the joy of the present moment. Please know you are not alone and know and believe that you are NOT a danger. You are a person with a common virus. It doesn't define you. 

It's wonderful you have spoken to your partner about it. They accept you and understand risks. Love is stronger than fear. Always remember that ❤️. 

Stay strong and hopeful. Hold onto the rational logic and truth that you have your antivirals and your partner understands the situation. It isn't your fault if you have an outbreak. You did your part by being honest with your partner and by being prepared with antivirals. 

If it helps, ask you partner for reassurance and explain your fear. Sometimes having a little support reminder from your partner makes all the difference. Like, asking them to say "I will still love you even if you have another outbreak," or "love is stronger than fear" really can help. When I'm anxious about my OCD thoughts I ask my mom for support. I'll say, "I'm worried about this but I don't need to be, right?" And she gives the reassurance and support I need. When we verbalize our fears, they loose their power over us. 

Love is stronger than fear! Remember this always! 

Reach out with any other questions or if you need any support. We are here for you! 🌟

Blessings,

grace

[Thebiglobowski]

@Flowerteacher55 thank you so much for your support it really helps and really means a lot ❤️  I always think about asking for reassurance, but I just dont want to freak them out by bringing it up if it's not an issue that affects them, because it's been years since my last/initial outbreak. Just always fearing if and when it'll come back. How do you not live with regret or anguish about it? That's another issue I always face with it. Thinking about it everyday and why I had to get it. Or that I could have avoided getting it by not putting myself in that situation. I just wish I knew how to forget about it all together being that it hasn't affected me in years. And it doesn't help I cry whenever I think about it. It's so hard not to cry when I talk about it, which is why I've only brought it up once to my partner. Sometimes it just feels like, somethings wrong with me 

[Flowerteacher55]

Hello! 

I completely understand. It's totally okay to cry when you talk about it. Emotions are not bad things, we just have to let them out in a healthy way. Crying is a totally acceptable way to let out sadness and feelings associated with how you got HSV. It's not your fault that you have it. If anything, you are not weaker for having HSV, but rather you are stronger. You've survived it! You're still here. You have a loving partner. Allow them the opportunity to comfort you. I'm sure if they knew how much anxiety and sadness you feel, they would want to help. They wouldn't want you to handle your fears alone. That is true love! 

I actually recently had an outbreak. I looked down at the sore and thought "alrighty then 😑" and then continued on with my day. After the first sore healed another one popped up and I honestly just frowned and laughed. I really didn't pay too much mind to it, granted I'm not in a relationship right now.

I kind of conceptualize sores like acne. Like if I have a pimple in the center of my forehead, I get a little upset. But I don't let it consume my thoughts. I am very grateful that I rarely get outbreaks (this was my third). My OCD makes me get really freaked out sometimes, but I usually try deep breathing or prayer to help myself calm down. I remind myself of the truth and remind myself that fear is liar. 

Sometimes we have to take a moment to calm down. I've had moments where I can't stop washing my hands or wiping the toilet seat and I have to make myself walk away from the bathroom and breathe and relax and compose myself. It's hard to relax when surrounded by an environment that gives us anxiety (for me it's the bathroom and kitchen) so it's okay to walk away, remind yourself of the facts and that washing your hands once is enough, and then continue on with your day. 

Having someone to hold you accountable and support you is really essential. My mom and brother know I have OCD and will interject if they see me obsessively washing a dish or getting super upset. It's awesome to be able to go to them and cry if I need to because I'm upset. Perhaps if you tell your partner about your constant anxiety, then when you need some support you can just say a codeword for when you are having your thoughts and fears. Then they can give you a hug and let you know there's nothing to fear, and that you're safe. It makes all the difference and helps the fear and anxiety get less strong! 

You are stronger than the fear you feel. You are a warrior! Build a support network and focus on healing the shame and sadness you feel. Remind yourself this is not your fault, and that you are not weak or any less of a person for having H. H doesn't have any power over you unless you give it power. Remember, you have H, H DOESN'T have you. 💪🏼

Stay strong and faithful to yourself. You are a blessing and you are worthy of happiness. Use your loving relationship to fight the fear and help your self-love grow. 

We are here for you! 

Sending positive healing vibes! 🌻☀️

 

 

[panosM.]

after 9 years having herpes sometimes i can not manage my emotions When an outbreak occurs I am also afraid for the next outbreak. It's difficult, but I'm trying 🙂