StupidMan Committed Adultery 20 times

[StupidMan20]

My wife and I have been married for 15 years and sexually involved for 16 years. It was our second marriage for both of us. After she went through menopause around 2012, her moods, dryness, and diminished sex drive put me in the selfish position to cheat. Over the last 15 years, I have cheated about 20 times with other female partners. Sometimes it was just once with a female and other times multiple times with the same one. I always wore condoms  except for one time with a married woman that I knew from work. All of the others were from websites. I was careful who I ate out because I love the taste of a clean and wet vagina. My wife, who I trust 100% had a minor breakout 18 months ago on her back, down by her tail bone. We didn’t think anything of it. A month ago, she had a minor breakout on her vagina. She got tested and she has HSV-2! Of course, I thought it came from my promiscuity. So I went and got tested and it came back negative. My wife says that she has only been with me and I trust and believe her. So we did another test for her at a lab, and again it came back positive for HSV-2. She is devastated and I feel so guilty. I want to confess but am afraid that she’ll leave me. 
 

1. Could she have caught her HSV-2 from me when my test says that I am not infected? 
 

2. How else could she have contracted this virus? The rep from the lab rudely told her it’s only gotten from vaginal intercourse, but I read other stuff that says it can come from skin to skin contact?

Any thoughts for this stupid man? 

[AlliKat12]

Hello,

There is a chance that the blood test is wrong.  I believe I read on here that a standard blood test can miss about 8 percent or 10 percent of HSV2 cases.  

HSV can lay dormant in the body and can cause symptoms when the immune system is fighting something else.  I tested positive for HSV1 in 2015 and didnt get an outbreak until 2022.  So anything is possible.  She lab lady is right, you can only get the virus by skin to skin contact.  So if she is having vaginal symptoms then it most likely came from vaginal penetration.  HSV2 likes to stay in the genital region.  HSV1 can be found in both places due to the increase of oral sex.  

There is a possibility that you do have it since she does.  I know there is something called a western blot test but I dont know much about it.  

Sorry I couldn't be of much help. 

[StupidMan20]

Thanks 🙏🏻