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    Welcome to the Herpes Opportunity Support Forum! We are a supportive and positive group to help you discover and live your Opportunity. Together, we can shed the shame and embrace vulnerability and true connection. Because who you are is more important than what you have. Get your free e-book and handouts here: https://www.herpesopportunity.com/lp/ebook

HSV 2 blood test positive in shock


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Posted

Hi All,

I am in shock and going through a range of emotions. Crying, thinking my life is over and hoping it was wrong.

I have been with my husband for 19years, and married for 6. Back in 2022 he had an outbreak out of nowhere, and then a few weeks or maybe months later a second one and has had nothing since 

I was concerned at the time as i have never had symtons, and we are not intimate at that time, since or very rare before this.

The only reason i decided to test was that we are getting divorced as i have found out he has been on dating apps for many years, so of course my mind goings into over drive.

 

Realising that all of the STD tests i have had, and all have been clear even back in 2023 dont include this.

I got my result from an at home test company yeaterday HSV1 is Negative and HSV2 positive at 5.28 IGg.

I dont know how to cope with this, do i speak to my dr in terms of help? How do i approach this in new relationships, can i ever be touched again without risk.

 

Also the stigma around this huge, so i am a risk but jenny at the bar who hasnt been tested is deemed as safe, but she might not be. She like me may never of had any outbreaks and wouks never of got tested.

 

Sorry for the rant.

Posted

Anyone? Just looking for some advise on how to cope  to talk to anyone that has gone through or is going through this.

Ive watched the videos and have been readingz but i would like to talk to others on how they are getting on 

Posted

 

Hey there, @belleb

First off, I’m really sorry you’re going through this. Getting a diagnosis like this, especially with everything else going on in your life, can feel overwhelming. It’s okay to feel the shock, sadness, and confusion—it’s a lot to process, and it’s all valid.

I know you know this on a certain level, but really let this sink in as truth: Your result doesn’t define your worth or your ability to have meaningful relationships. Period. Herpes is just a skin condition caused by a super common virus. That’s all it is. The stigma can feel heavy, but it’s based on misconceptions, not facts. You are not alone in this — millions of people have herpes and go on to have amazing relationships and full, happy lives. If you see all the facts from the handouts, you see how little a deal this thing really is. Now, this is not to diminish what you're feeling — I felt the same way! But again, it's build on stigmatized feelings and perceptions, not facts. Check out the ebook and handouts here to start putting things in perspective: https://www.herpesopportunity.com/lp/ebook

Talking to your doctor is a great next step. They can answer your questions about managing the virus and help you get on antivirals if that’s the right choice for you. Antivirals can reduce the risk of transmission (also see facts about this ini the handouts) and help ease your mind moving forward.

As for future relationships, herpes doesn’t mean you can’t be touched or loved! Drop that notion immediately! 🙂 It does mean being open and honest when the time is right. Disclosing can feel scary, but the right person will see you — not your diagnosis. The way you frame it matters, too. Herpes is just a fact of life for many people, not a dealbreaker. You’re still you. Check out all the videos on disclosure here for more on that: https://www.herpesopportunity.com/tag/the-herpes-talk

You’re absolutely right about the stigma. Most people who have herpes don’t even know they have it. The fact that you do know means you can take steps to protect both yourself and others. That’s not a risk — it’s responsibility and care. People who are oblivious to their STI situation are much more risky to be with. And that's most of society. Denial is a seductive drug. And a lot of people are hooked on it. 

Take it one step at a time. You’re not alone in this, and you have so much life and love ahead of you.

You’ve got this. And if you need one-on-one support, here's my availability: https://calendly.com/adrial/25

This content is for informational purposes only. This information does not constitute medical advice or diagnosis. I'm not a medical professional, so please take this as friendly peer support. 

Helpful resources:

Posted

@mr_hopp

Thank you for your response. Navigating a divorce is certainly overwhelming, and I appreciate the information and support you've shared.

I’ve looked through the free eBook you mentioned, but unfortunately, I’m not in a financial position to invest in additional resources or support at the moment.

 

Right now, it feels like this situation has taken away any future opportunities or hope, which has been tough to process.

There is someone I’m connected with, and while we’re not physically intimate, I feel this relationship could be challenging to navigate. We’re not dating due to my ongoing divorce, but I’m unsure how—or even if—I should share this aspect of my health with them we dont meet in person and its all via text currently.

I hope my doctors here in the UK can provide more guidance, but they seem reluctant to address sexual health issues directly, often referring patients to clinics. Those clinics, however, won’t provide treatment unless there’s an active outbreak. I’d really like to explore long-term options to reduce the risk of transmission and take proactive steps to manage this.

I’ve been researching a lot of different sources on this topic, but I’m finding it hard to distinguish what’s accurate or applicable. For example, I’m unclear on whether transmission can occur through hand contact or if it’s primarily sexual. If protection is used and I’m asymptomatic and on suppressive medication, is the risk significantly reduced? i feel i need to arm myself with stats and figures for my own sanity and also for any conversations that may arise.

Any guidance or clarity you can provide would mean so much to me during this challenging time.

Thank you 

Posted

Couple thoughts:

For the first few months after infection, autoinnoculation is a concern. It sounds like you are asymptomatic, but just in case - Wash your hands often, especially after using the bathroom. You don't want to spread it to your hands. I saw you're in the UK - You may be interested in getting a Western Blot as a confirmatory test, though I am not sure were in the UK you can get one.

Posted

@NerdP423 thank you, its likely that ive had this for atleast 5-6 years as I have been in anyway intimate with my partner to get it.

I am in the Uk, i have also spoken to Terri warren and she thinks it would likely confirm on a western blot as i have mostly likely been exposed many years ago. Even my husband as he didnt know, or even I but ive never had anything remotely like a rash, blister, etc.

Also highly frustrated that after many STD screens dont check for this, and neither of us have been aware. Going through many many years of IVF and clinics meant we get these regularly.

Thanks for the advice.

 

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