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New to the Community....Hello All


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I'm new to the H community. I just joined yesterday after getting up enough nerve/strength to finally do it. I've been reading every day all of the posts, comments, great advice, and the knowledge from many of you is fantastic! I have learned a lot from this forum and I have also educated myself by reading some great books on H. Even though I don't really know any of you, I feel like I am already part of a great community and I hope to share, learn, and grow with you all. We're all in this together.

 

I was diagnosed in December. I will never forget that night the doctor called and told me I was positive for HSV2-

G (blood test). I was devastated even though I had a slight idea that it might be positive due to symptoms I had in November; one sore and vaginal itching for two weeks (felt like the yeast infection from HELL). My first thought was...how am I going to tell the new guy I had just started dating (we have NOT been intimate...thankfully). I will eventually have to have "the talk" with him but for now we can't be intimate because I just recently had surgery and can't for 7 weeks...giving me some time to gather more facts, learn from you all, and to figure out how I'm going to break the news to him. He's the sweetest, most patient guy I have ever met (I will save this for another post).

 

I never had any issue with previous relationships until this last one. I knew him for 3 1/2 months, or so I thought I did. We agreed to wait for sex when we first met and here I thought he was being a great guy; not rushing or being pushy. He told me all the things I wanted to hear...how great I was, how I was a great mom, I made him laugh, how well we connected, that there wasn't anyone else, and he wanted to see how things went with us. We were planning a trip to the ocean and things seemed to be great. I felt like I could trust him, so we became intimate (twice in October). After the last time (Halloween), he text me saying that the sex was great but it was strictly a sex thing for him. What? Are you kidding me? I asked him why he said all those things to me and he said he was wrong for saying all that. I was devastated, pissed, ashamed, and just totally felt stupid for falling for all that. I was blind-sided. I let my guard down because I felt he was being honest with me. His one big thing when we first started talking was how much he was into honesty and how much it meant to him. I was always honest with him, yet didn't get that in return. The day after we ended, he was with an ex-girlfriend of his for the entire weekend. They were engaged within a month and a half Funny, huh? Makes me wonder....

 

I'm positive it was from him. I started with symptoms within 2 weeks of being intimate. I called him the night I found out and told him that I had bad news. Right away he said he didn't have anything and got all defensive. I explained that some people never show symptoms and that I didn't have any issues until being with him. I told him he needed to get tested especially since he was in a relationship with someone and that he needed to be honest with her. He said he would get tested and I asked him to let me know his results. Obviously, he never did. Only thing he did was block me on FB. Really? I had already "unfriended" him but he had to go to the extreme. Anyway, I feel I did my part by telling him and being the honest person. I just couldn't not tell him knowing he was with someone else and possibly infecting her if he had it.

 

If only I could take those two times back. I just wish there was a "do over" button that I could push and be able to redo/change some of my decisions/actions. I'm learning to accept this. It's hard at times, like a roller coaster ride. Some days I'm accepting and feel I'm not going to let this get the best of me, other days I feel stupid for not protecting myself better, for being too trusting, and not having the knowledge. But you know, I have to be honest here. I never really knew you could get herpes without any symptoms/sores. I don't remember being told that in health class back in high school. Too late now.

 

Thanks for allowing me to be part of this great "H" family, and I look forward to getting to know some of you better. I still have questions, and I welcome comments, advice, and knowledge that any of you are willing to share.

 

Hugs!!

 

Hey...anyone know how to resize my pic..lol. I love the beach and it won't let me resize my beach pic for my thumbnail (not liking part sky/cloud as my thumbnail pic).

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beachluvr

 

First - Welcome! Glad you got up the nerve to post :)

 

Honey - if there was a do-over button there would be a free-for-all of all the H+ folks out there that would make a Black Friday melee at Best Buy look like a walk in the park. And the Sex Ed classes in High School are sooo far behind the times (actually, you can't blame them...the average Family Doctor is terribly misinformed and you would think THEY should know)

 

We'll be glad to help you through your "learning curve" time with Herpes.... ask/rant/comment away!!!

 

And I'd OM Adrial about the photo :)

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Welcome beachluvr!

 

Although you may feel very alone some days, as i do as well, you aren't! As you do, i also have bad and good days. Sometimes i feel ashamed, and sometimes i feel as i can use this to better myself. The fact of the matter is that there is no going back and all we can do is move forward. I just found out in November, someone similar to your story, with trusting too much and not getting the answers in the end.. so i am no expert at this but i do find comfort in supporting others.. this site has helped me so much and it helps to get all the information you can. things will get better, they always do! xoxo

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Dancer...your Black Friday comment had me laughing. I was picturing it in my head lol. If only that was true for us. I'd be one of those people sleeping in a tent for a few days to be near the front of the line for a "do over" button instead of a big TV.

 

lt05..thanks for your support/comment. It's so much easier knowing we are all in the same situation here; doesn't feel as lonely anymore. I'm open to sharing, learning, growing and gaining knowledge about this from the great people on here. I'm not going to let a blister get the best of me. Life goes on..day by day.

 

Hugs!!

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Beachluv, I found out i h in October thought it was a yeast infection i was seeing someone at time told that i had a yeast infection but was getting test for a std he freak well make this short results came back except one I found out had clymida got i think got from the guy i was seeing nervous he had it to. Well the the doctor called wanted to talk about my last test results came back well find out it was herpes 2 I cryed called the guy i was seeing told him my results he said he was sorry said he cared for but couldn't date I was like whatever and said good bye told him if he re

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