Tested positive for HSV 1.

[thatguy]

How would you guys disclose this to your other half? I'm afraid that I would be left alone and however I think she probably has the infection even way before me. I dunno how I got HSV 1, but I don't want to dwell on the negativity. I found out this is very common and I'm only concerned by the ignorance that the majority of the world has when really almost everyone has it. What do I do?

[WCSDancer2010]

Hello @thatguy !

 

So do you know where you have it??? That will help to figure out the best way to approach this.

 

For one, Welcome to the Club - 80% of people have HSV1. Most have it on their lip (ie, Cold Sores), although half of the new Genital HSV diagnosis cases are HSV1 from oral sex.

 

So, a lot will depend on where you have it... orally, well, 60% of young people have HSV1 oral by the time they are young adults. That other 20% mentioned above would be more people with oral herpes and those with genital HSV1. If you have the cold sore version, well, then, you just have to be very very careful with oral sex and kissing... if you want to reduce the chance of passing it on you can take anti-virals from 9-18% of the time to about half that.

 

If you have it genitally, well, the good news is that once you've had it a year or more, the instance of shedding is a lot lower than HSV2 (3-5% of the time as opposed to 15-30% for HSV2). Soooo, if you take anti-virals, the chance of passing it on in any form is a LOT lower.

 

Either way, if she has it (and odds are she does) then you have nothing to worry about because you can't give her "more" of the virus...she will already have antibodies for it.

 

So - how to disclose? Say you have found out you have the same virus that causes cold sores, and ask if she has ever had them. (BTW, it doesn't mean either of you got it from the other one ... it's THAT common). If she has had them you need to just let her know that it's a potential STD BUT that you have it too and it's all good. If not, you two decide whether you want to go on anti-virals.

 

(((HUGS)))

 

 

[thatguy]

Thanks for your kind insights. I never had a cold sore in my life. None of the symptoms applied to me. What shocked me was the fact that I got a 3.85 value on the testing for HSV 1 but I can't figure out how I got it. I'm just concerned because my girl is a virgin, and we have done oral sex on each other. I never knew though and always thought I was clean. I'm just scared that this will ruin everything I worked hard for. I never had symptoms either so for me, it wasn't a big deal. However, researching about the disease, I do see that over 90% of the world's population having it and that it's not something I should worry about. With that being said, the way it is portrayed is that anyone with HSV got it with only sex and that there are other factors that do play a role.

 

I think if I do have the actual strain of HSV 1, I most likely got it during childhood.

[WCSDancer2010]

So yes - odds are you have the Oral/coldsore version and you likely got it in childhood. You may want to ask your parents if you ever got a cold sore as a kid, just to be able to pinpoint where you have it, because you *could* have it gentially from oral sex - only 40% of guys have a real OB after they contract it so if you never had symptoms, you won't know which area is the one you need to deal with as far as protecting a partner.

 

I would have her tested because if she has it, you have absolutely no worries. If she doesn't, then you may want to use anti-virals to keep her from getting it with oral sex. Either way, this is something that you can live with and it it shouldn't ruin everything. If you need to, have her come on here so we can answer her questions, ok! :)

[thatguy]

You are awesome with the support. I appreciate it.

[paranoiahsv1]

i have the same exact case/diagnosis and i've been so confused on how to deal with it. hsv1, no symptoms; never gotten a cold sore my entire life. you're not alone.