Just found out I have HSV-2

[Optimist13]

Hello, not really sure what to say really.

I have just had a phone call to confirm that I have HSV-2. I am 25, and a very very very happy outgoing person. I hope this wont' all change now.

I broke up with my boyfriend of 1 year 8 months ago and I have not been with anyone since. I was tested before I got with him and I was all clear. After being with him for a while I found out he had paid 2 prostitutes in Thailand for sex before I met him. I have no idea if this is where I got it from but I can't help think that there is a good chance it was and I feel angry because of that.

For the year that we were together I constantly had yeast infections and sistitus but nothing else. I went to the doctors many times and they said that everything was fine. I had never had either of these before.

So far all I have had is 1 blister last week and then 3 more came up at the weekend and that is when I went to the doctors and they confirmed it as HSV-2 today. I think that I probably would not have gone to the doctors had I not have known what to look out for with HSV because they were gone within a day. I have had no other symptoms at all. Do you think this was my first proper outbreak? Could it get much worse?

I feel so horrible because I am dreading the day I meet someone I really care about and I am worried they won't want to know and I am ashamed at having to tell them. I have only told my mum about this because I feel she is the only one I can trust. I have just moved away so feeling pretty alone at the moment.

One minute I feel like its no big deal because its just like a cold sore only in a different area and others I freak out at all of the side effects and having to tell someone etc.

What are the chances of me passing it on to someone?

I have to say that I am one of the luckiest people in the world and generally a very happy person, I just don't want things to change but now I know that they have to but I just want to know that it won't be so bad. I just can't stop crying at the moment :-(

[Kaande05]

:-(. The beginning is the hardest. As with most things, it will get better with time. First what you need to realize is that heroes does not define you. It is not an automatic sentence of pain and lonliness for the rest of your life, unless you want it to be. Adrial talks a lot about self fufilling proficies and if you hide yourself because your afraid of being alone and rejected well then you will be alone. If you haven't had time to read thru posts and read te e-book I really suggest you do so. It's an eye opener and really helped me to get my positive outlook back.

 

 

[Optimist13]

Thank you Kaande, I have read the book and feel much better now. I know I won't be alone because there is definitely more to me than HSV. I do believe everything happens for a reason I just need to wait and see what this one is. I have had HSV for nearly 2 years and just not known about it so why should I be any different. I just need to disclose to anyone I decide to get close to and its up to them if they like me enough it won't matter to them just like it wouldn't matter to me. We'll see if I am feeling so optimistic when I have to do that :-/

[Kaande05]

Right.... I think it's very important to be very very comfortable with yourself before disclosing. This is true for anything tho! You need to love yourself first before having a successful relationship. If you don't do this 1 of 2 things will happen.... I know from personal experience.... Either you will be accepted and if your eventually break up, the whole silly idea of herpes being bad and all the stigmatized ideas will come back to you in time of heartbreak, or you will be rejected and the idea that herpes is what caused it will be very tough to handle.

 

Work on improving yourself and being the best version of you can be. When your ready to disclose the ones you care about will look at heroes as just a small thing they would have to risk and with all your other positive attributes it will be well worth the risk.

 

I was in a miserable place a month ago, staying active in this community has been my life saver!!!

 

Good luck to you

[lelani]

Welcome Optimist :-) Kaande is right - right now is the hardest for you and I remember it well (have had it a year). It gets better and H is good for pushing you to live healthy and well and is a great insurance policy for weeding out people who aren't good for you (inluding potential lovers).

 

People are rejected for all sorts of reasons (my daugher was dumped once because the guy didn't like her teeth!)...it takes a special person to accept you with H and they are worth waiting for. It didn't matter to me and while I am not with my giver any more we will always be good friends, he told me and I took the risk.

 

Kaande I love your sentence about working on being the best person you can be...I think that is the best piece of advice for everyone :-) It's not what happens to us, its how we deal with it and choosing to be happy and living well is the best way to overcome things. It's not always easy and it takes practice reframing our thoughts.

 

Just nuture yourself right now O...this is probably not your first episode seeing you've had yeast infections and sistius regularly. And I doubt it will get worse. Eat well, rest and let go of that fear about meeting someone in the future...live in the present and be the happy person you are :-)

[Optimist13]

Thank you Leani, I am not looking for anyone at the moment and am happy being the way I am. I think that is the important thing. I am a lucky one always have been and I am not going to let this change my mind about that. I hope that is the only episode I am going to have though, some of the stories I have read on here are so bad.

I must have had it for nearly 2 years now and not known about it so I figure that is a good thing.

When the time is right I am sure I will meet someone who realises this is just a skin virus that isn't too major. Just shows I care by disclosing :-)

This is really a lovely forum, I haven't told anybody except for my mum and I plan on keeping it that way for a while until I have dealt with it. To be honest nobody else needs to know. It would be nice to be able to tell my friends but gossip like this travels fast and I just don't need that really.

Having a lovely forum like this going is good enough for me so thank you for replying guys :-)

 

[lelani]

Hey O...if you have always been a lucky one then it says alot about how you will deal with H..its not luck, its how you think :-) Be happy, stay in the present and only disclose when you feel you need to - you have it sussed ;-) x

 

[Optimist13]

Thank you lelani :-)