casual contact reassurance

[seeker]

bah, I hate this virus and how it makes me worry. so, last night my son stayed over. one of our fav things is ill lay with him and we talk at bedtime. well I used the facilities and layed with him. I touched his back and then I thought, " crap did I was my hands?" now ive no open sores, but a fair amount of itching. I did take antivirals yesterday. I know the chances are infinitesimal that I A. got shed virus on my hand, B didn't wash my hands ( its so innocuous that I couldn't remember but at a minimum pre H id rinse them) C. took almost a minute to lay down D touched his back, a fairly non mucous membrane an area as they come. heck I woke more worried about it than I did last night. no way no how correct? shed virus HAS to be "worked" into the skin or a cut and for a fair amount of time also. I know in my mind its no way no how, or freakin everybody would have it, literally.

[whitedaisies]

You are correct seeker. No way.

 

Btw so sweet how u r with ur son.

[Chinup]

Seeker, been there too lol!!! There are times when I'm mid diaper change and I'm like OH CRAP.. Did I wash my hands last time I used the bathroom?? Ahhhhh I'm terrified of passing this to my daughter.. I'm terrified and paranoid about EVERYTHING right now.. Ugh, can't wait until it passes and really does just become an "annoying skin condition" one day.. I'm sure both of our children are fine and perfectly safe.. We aren't as "contaminated" as we feel :-)

 

Have a great day!!!

[WCSDancer2010]

We didn't know about asymptomatic shedding when mine were babies so I never worried about doing more than normal hygiene stuff and mine never got it. Shared towels and baths and such. Do yes, you are right, if it was THAT contagious everyone would look like they had leprosy

 

I'm on my phone now so can't post links easily but go to my blog www.supporttruthanddialogue.com and look for the blog on "touching, towels, ... oh my!" For a giggle and a reality check :)

[seeker]

hey all thanks. funny I was less worried about it when it happened than the next morning. (it was pre coffee tho) dancer I think ive read that, back when I first discovered this site. ive read your blog a bit here and there. I enjoy the camaraderie here, the support and the fact that its me and broken surrounded by a bunch of hot women, woot.

 

dancer, I do have an odd question id like to ask. I know you have been living with H for quite some time, I know you have " come out of the closet" so to speak. I know you have had rejection for having H. my question is, have you been rejected not for having H but for being out about it? im always impressed by your courage about this, I couldn't do it personally. I hope im not stepping over some boundary here, if so just tell me to bugger off.

[WCSDancer2010]

Well, odds are if I have been rejected for being so open, I wouldn't know it as those guys won't contact me. ;)

 

I have over 1000 friends on FB - to my knowledge I didn't lose any when I came out there... didn't have one negative reaction, and only words of support, encouragement, etc.

 

You would be surprised how cool people are about me having H. Its allowed several to confide in me that they had it and were unaware of many of the facts so I have been able to help educate and support them. It's allowed others to find out that they need to be tested, for which they have been thankful for that knowledge. And still others now understand that condoms don't protect from everything ... and that they can't tell by looking that their partner is "clean".

 

What I DO get on the online dating is men who admire my honesty and would want to get to know me BECAUSE of it ... and THAT is the kind of man I want in my life, not one that feels I should hide my status because it may be embarrassing to him if anyone found out about it. ;)

[WCSDancer2010]

This is the link about my coming out including the (public) link to where I came out on FB so you can see it for yourself including the responses

 

http://herpeslife.com/herpes-forum/discussion/1754/i039m-out-of-the-herpes-closet

[seeker]

that's great. I was curious if there had been any " im ok with YOU having it, just not with everyone else knowing" aka guilt by association. which would probably read more as " im afraid people might think I have it"

 

im telling you this getting comfortable with this virus is a pain in the tuckus. im really not liking the shedding thing, that makes me paranoid. a sore I can avoid or I know to not touch and wash up after. its the idea that virus is sneaking out of me. ie I had an eye itch last night I rubbed with my finger and I know I had touched myself, no sores, antivirals last 2 days because of possible OB ( itchiness is gone) and I freaked. ran into the bathroom washed my hands and splashed water in my eye. im weird in that im ok with almost any scarring on my body and damage to it except my face ( I already don't have much to work with in that dept ) my eyes and my spine. but my eyes esp. I like seeing the beauty in our world, keeps me on a better note and quite honestly, I think woman are the most incredible thing God put on this or any planet, I just love admiring their beauty and all its manifestations. but not in a creepy way, lol.

[havefaith427]

I took a shower with my daughter and used the same washcloth and then started freaking out! I was so scared that I gave her this condition. I was in a panic. But these lovely people calmed me down and reassured me that it would be highly unlikely! Mrs. WCDSDancer has always helped in all of my discussions on here :). I'm sure your son is fine. I also LOVE to cuddle my daughter at bed time. She is my little snuggle bear. And by being concerned it shows that you are a great mother and a caring one at that!

[seeker]

thanks havefaith but im a dad.

[Chrissyny]

seeker it is kinda normal to think these things, silly as they are, but you cannot pass it like that to your son. By the way, how old is your son?

[seeker]

my boy is 12

[seeker]

im one of the token men on here :)

 

[whitedaisies]

Maybe a token man but a lucky one! LOL!

 

Nice to be accompanied by so many lovely women on this forum.

 

;)

 

 

[Chrissyny]

12 cute age, boy do they grow up fast.

[myfiercecalm]

He's lucky to have a caring father like you Seeker. I'm sure he'll be just fine and you can teach him more about H than other parents will for their kids if you choose to :)

[seeker]

@ chrissyny, yea fun age. we fish, archery, swim, do goofy stuff. im a 49 Y/o ,am I get to play with legos!!! and they are far better than when I was a kid.

 

@ my fierce , he gets a bit put off, " dad stop it!" but I think its funny. I tell him its a medical term for a body part but I think his hangup is they get into trouble at school for saying stuff like that, not because the word is bad but the ensuing chaos of a 6 ( last year) grade class.

[seeker]

@ myfierce, erp that last part was in response to another post about a certain word being repeated to my son.

[WCSDancer2010]

the ensuing chaos of a 6 ( last year) grade class.

 

My oldest went back to college at 24, and she says she *STILL* giggles at certain anatomical references and I guess she wasn't alone in it ... which created some funny moments in many of her Biology and similar Science classes :p

[Trying]

Oh my .... This is so me lol