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5 days in to first herpes outbreak - Is there an end in sight!?!

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Hi all,


I started with a raw uncomfortable feeling for a couple of days, when it persisted, I grabbed a small mirror to take a look up there. I nearly had a heart attack when I saw the small cluster of blisters & knew immediately what it was, especially when the sore tingly feeling became more intense & constant! I then developed the flu like symptoms and general unwell feeling that goes with it. I must say though, after the initial horror, I feel quite ok with it, I keep thinking, well, it's only really a cold sore in a different area, I guess I can learn to live with that!?! Researching it & reading the great info you all share on here helps :)


Anyway, I went & got Tea Tree Oil which I've been dabbing on, some Lysine & Zinc tablets & some Zovirax cream (in case it pops up anywhere else) is there any point in taking prescription anti viral meds? I would prefer natural healing if it is just as effective?


The only issue for me is that my boyfriend of 6 years doesn't have it (does get oral cold sores often though) & while he's been perfectly fine & supportive about it, we get married next week, so I'm really hoping it subsides before the honeymoon!!! I'm only 5 days in, any ideas on if this may be a possibility by then, even with protection, I don't want to put him at risk? My only other questions are, is it easily spread to other areas such as mouth or eyes? If having an outbreak, what are the signs (if any) that it is starting to heal?

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OK....if your wedding is next week get on antivirals.....


you got it likely from his oral hsv1 and it went to your genitals. He has some antibodies b/c he has it orally, he can still get it genitally but risks are small. If you use antivirals, condoms and avoid sex during outbreaks you are looking at less than 1%.


Sorry gotta run......will write later.



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Thanks whitedaisies,


Yes, we figured it was passed on that way, we thought it only contagious while blisters were actually present, so wish I'd researched that earlier!!!


That sort of percentage is really reassuring, info everywhere else is so confusing, so glad I found this site xo


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Hello and Welcome!


Well, I hate to say it but the odds are not good for you to be totally healed in time for the wedding ... I'm guessing you got HSV1 from oral sex but unless you get a swab of the area you won't know for sure. This being your first OB, your body has no antibodies so it will take awhile for it to learn how to deal with it.


Given you are getting married in a week, I'd get to a Dr and get on the Antivirals - if nothing else if you can get it under control you will at least not be uncomfortable for your honeymoon ... you will just have to find other ways to be intimate though.... yes you may want to eventually allow your body to learn how to handle it, but right now may not be the time.... AND, you can still pass this to your partner's genitals even though he has some immunity to it (assuming you have HSV1). So you want to do what you can to protect him too.


Yes - you want to be careful about autoinnoculating yourself in other areas/the eyes ... once you are about 4-6 months in you should be ok. Just practice normal good hygiene - wash hands after touching the area and don't touch your eyes unless you know your hands are clean.


Check these links out .... and come back with any questions you have :)




Handouts + disclosure e-book:






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Thanks Dancer,


I have been just about scrubbing up for surgery regularly lol Though am worried I may not have been so careful before I noticed blisters & was already infected. My eyes have been a little tired & sore but hard to tell because I feel a little feverish anyway??? I'm on night shifts too which I am sure isn't helping. Just hope I don't look like a zombie bride on the day!


Appreciate you taking the time to share your experience with us newbies, more informative than Google that's for sure :)

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I've read all the links you have kindly shared & while it still completely sucks, I think that if this is true that future OBs are less frequent an intense I can learn to deal with this, well, I'll have to!!!

Found it hard sleeping today though cause was stinging and itching like crazy, could have ripped the thing off!

Another question: My bf and I did have unprotected sex a few times before I noticed the blisters and I was already inflamed & raw, I feel really terrible about that but I just didn't know. If he does develop it down there now, could we trigger outbreaks on each other when we have sex in the future if we both end up having it?


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Well, there's definitely a chance you were shedding ... but some people have amazing immune systems so we will cross fingers that his was working overtime those days. But if he does have it, the good thing is that after the initial "adjustment" period where your bodies are making antibodies and learning how to deal with it, you should be mostly fine. Yes - initially sex may re-trigger an OB (just use that time to learn other ways to be intimate ;) ) but over time it should have less of an effect. Rough sex may be a little tricky but just use tons of lube if you are into that. :)


The bottom line is that if both people have it, you can't give each other "more" after the first few months. Once it's established in an area, and the antibodies are built up, it usually remains there and you will get to know your particular prodromes and where to watch for OB's.



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Just doing some more research, so much contradictory info out there! Some sites say it is quite rare to get oral h from genital h, others say it is a high risk? One even said you can pass type 2 on through your saliva while having oral sex... What the!!!


I'm hoping for rare myself, anyone know?

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Regarding being totally 'out' Good on you! I bet I'd be surprised by how many others I know would have it too if I did that. So tempted just to say it to get it off my chest at times, I feel like just carrying that around like its a dirty little secret just adds to that social stigma, hopefully I get to that point later on. It's early days for me but honestly, I'm amazed at how relaxed I now am about it, no it's not great but at the end of the day it's only a small sore, we can't be beating ourselves up over that!!!

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Transferring HSV-2 from the genitals to the mouth is pretty rare. Only 1-2% of oral herpes is HSV-2. That's based on the CDC. :) And no, you can't pass herpes through the saliva (unless you're having an outbreak and the liquid inside of the outbreak actually mixes with your saliva). Herpes is passed skin-to-skin, so it's spread via the original area of infection. It doesn't travel through your system or get pushed through all the pores of your body. I know it may feel like you're a big ol' bag of virus when you first get it, but once you get the facts down, you see that's just not the case.


Check out the handouts here for all the facts jam-packed into 2 pages:



And yeah, being "out" can definitely feel like a weight off the shoulders. Because that's when you might actually realize what the true ratio is about "me judging myself" vs. "the world judging me." When I came out to everyone, I was amazed by how much I was just projecting onto the world around me. I was assuming that everyone else would have the same negative opinions about me that I had about me. But when I actually gave them the opportunity to hear me and respond, all I was met with was love, acceptance, and a few "Yeah, so what?"s ... So much of stigma is in our heads. It's fascinating to see that first-hand. And it's also important that you take it at your own pace. You'll know when/if you're ready to come out to friends and family. In all of the "coming out" stories I've heard, it ultimately underlines who in your life loves you for you. The few people who would actually judge you and reject you as a friend or family member? What kind of friends or family are they?


Check out these interviews with others from our H Opp community who have come out of the herpes closet ...





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Wonderful for you! You are coming along so quickly. Took me months. Lol


Helps having an understanding lovig person by ur side.


I hope u have a wonderful wedding but more importantly a beautiful fulfilling marriage. That's most important. Remember to not lose you in it.


Hugs and kisses and congratulations.

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Just doing some more research, so much contradictory info out there! Some sites say it is quite rare to get oral h from genital h, others say it is a high risk? One even said you can pass type 2 on through your saliva while having oral sex... What the!!!


Yes - TONS of incorrect/inaccurate/BAD info out there. Please be careful where you get your info.... we only support facts that can be backed up from places like the CDC websites, Westover Heights, Washington University and other University sites, and the like.


Again - you said your fiance gets cold sores a lot ... so the odds are that you have HSV1 from having oral sex with him when he had an OB or had one coming on/just healing when you did and he passed it on that way (which is where some people mistakenly believe that you can get it from saliva ... they don't realize it's because someone has HSV1 orally and can be shedding there without visible OB).


Please get it typed when you can. This week is probably not going to happen with the wedding coming. You may want to use condoms until you know for sure. I'm not a betting person but I'd put money on you having HSV1 ... in which case, your fiance already has antibodies and you just need to be careful to not have sex with an obvious OB - the antibodies will help to protect him but are not 100% guarantee he won't get it genitally from you.


*IF* you have HSV2, only 1-2% of people get H2 orally ... so you would be pretty safe for oral sex there too.


Again - check out the handouts and such that Adrial and I gave you the links to and check out this video:


Herpes facts video
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Thanks Adrial & whitedaisies,


I really related to that chat with Cicily :)


I guess it is a great filter for those around you, I'm now 40, so really don't care too much for fake people in my life at this point anyway, which perhaps is why I am coping with it better than I initially thought I would. This community has been and will continue to be a massive help in the journey for me too, so much love and support out there <3


It does really help to have support of a partner, at least I have one person right now I can confide in for starters, he's been amazing so far.


I'm sure the wedding day will be great, must say, this has put a bit of a dampener on the wedding night though :(


This is my 2nd marriage, got lost in the first, good advice, I learnt that lesson the hard way lol


We're off to Bali to do it, so hopefully no chance of further infections from dirty water/conditions etc over there while still having first OB, anyone have any experience or info about the risks?



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Thanks Dancer, will definitely put that into practice ;)


Great simple and informative video too, going to get my partner to watch it, he's probably sick of me trying to explain it all, I feel like an overnight expert thanks to H Opp, well... considering I knew absolutely nothing just a week ago! Makes us Aussies seem a bit small though lol


Will let you know how I get on with type. Thanks again xo

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