Surprise, you have genital herpes!

[ashleychristine]

I recently turned 23 years old and wasn't expecting another birthday present from my boyfriend. Yeah, I got herpes for my birthday. Let's see... about two weeks ago I was diagnosed with HSV-2. Hmm... that was one unpleasant visit to the doctors office, who knew genital herpes was so obnoxious? I was not aware until now and definitely did not think that's why I felt so sick, but I had my suspicions. I'm pretty sure that I contracted the virus from my boyfriend of 8 months. He goes away for 2 weeks at a time for work and I haven't been able to tell him about my exciting two weeks of hell. Well, tomorrow is the big day and I am losing sleep over it. I have no idea how I'm going to tell him... and the thought of if he knew he had the virus and gave it to me willingly keeps racing through my mind. (DEEP BREATH) Anyways, I stumbled upon this website in a moment of despair the other day and a lot of you folks gave me hope. I was touched by your words of compassion and encouragement. I just wanted to say thank you for giving me a well needed reality check - that it will not always be so painful and difficult to deal with. You guys really do have an awesome little community here. :) Thank you.

[lelani]

I feel for you honey..yes I can imagine the deep breath. I'm glad you stumbled on us...yeah its a lovely group of people who get what you are going through because so have we. You can get a lot of support on here.

 

Now when you take that deep breath as you let it out just let go... relax and know that everything will work out whatever happens.

 

When you tell him avoid any blame...just say its been an awful two weeks, you have been ill and there is something you have to tell him. Did yo have a blood test or just a swab? The blood test will tell you if it is a recent infection or if you have had it longer. You may have had it a while and not known. He may not know he has it either if he's had no symptoms.

 

If he has it and knowingly hasn't told you its pretty much a deal breaker. If he chooses not to get tested and share the results with you...another deal breaker. .

 

But he may not know, or the information about having H and transmission facts given to him if he does may have been completely wrong...and you may have given it to him if you have been with someone else before him.

 

So be as calm as you can...whatever happens you will be ok!!! You might be angry and upset..that's ok! No matter how he reacts... respond with honesty, integrity and kindness - you will feel better and good about yourself and that is what is important. Yep you have been thrown the H curve ball but its up to you to catch it and run with it, being the best you can be. I'll be sending you lots of good thoughts and hugs ( we all need them :-) ). You are right it won't always be this painful to deal with and you will get through it. xx

[ashleychristine]

Thank you Lelani, you are actually the reason I joined the website because you are so positive and upbeat. I told him tonight and he was actually really supportive and just as confused as I was. Tomorrow we are going to the doctor so he can be tested. But... no matter what happens it is very comforting to know that there is a lot of wonderful people out there who don't let this define who they are. And that makes me hopeful.

[mr_hopp]

ashleychristine, I'm so happy to hear that you had the talk with him and that he was supportive. Shows your character and his as well. Good work. And yes, we are always here for you if you need us.