What I Finally Did After Asking Everyone to Diagnose Me!

[SidneySmith]

Dear Forum Members and Those of You Who are Deeply Concerned About Your Health

 

I spent one month on message boards explaining my condition and asking for a diagnosis or opinions. Looking back, it was WRONG and simply not wise. This is my life and my future!

 

After that month, I ended up more confused.

 

Here is Truth I have learned: I am the only one who knows my body. I am the only one who knows my story. I am the only one who has the "gut" intuition that something is wrong. So, here's my advice to those of you who are experiencing what I call "Funny Tummy." (Or, "my gut feeling" . . . Intuition..):

 

Plan A++++: Please call the Westover Heights Clinic at 503-226-6678, http://www.westoverheights.com/. They are probably one of the finest clinics for sexual health in the country. They've been in business in Oregon for 30 years. And no, I am not an employee.

 

They will charge you $5.00 per minute for a phone consultation with an ACTUAL DOCTOR. Your anguish over health concerns would probably be worth a 20 minute, $100 phone consultation with an MD who sees dozens of people like you every week. Unfortunately your family MD probably thinks if the virus doesn't kill you, you don't have much to worry about. Truth is many general practitioners are not well-versed in STDs.

 

I went on multiple message boards asking questions / diagnosis about my specific HSV condition, which was peculiar. I was told MANY different opinions. Finally, after of month of total confusion reading stuff on the web, I finally called the clinic. SHOULD HAVE BEEN PLAN A++++.

 

My doctor, Lisa Taulbee, was non-judgmental, compassionate, attentive, and told me facts about / which 90% of the people on Herpes message boards were misinformed. My error was not talking to an actual DOCTOR who specialized in conditions such as the one's you and I have. Instead I went to message boards first looking for a diagnosis. And in the end, a large percentage of well-meant, loving people were totally misinformed about the facts of my Herpes outbreak.

 

My encouragement to everyone who is reading this post: CALL THE CLINIC FIRST TO RECEIVE A CONSULTATION, WISDOM AND DIRECTION, then come to cool forums like this for support. I believe it is a HUGE mistake for anyone on these forums to be giving a diagnosis. Encouragement, perspective, love, and support? YES! Keep it coming!!!!

 

I hope that all of us who are not DOCTORS who specialize in sexual health would stop diagnosing people. I am not trying to cause problems, but the bottom line is I did not speak to a professional first. I should have. I take responsibility for that -- 100%.

 

Peace and Strength to You . . . :)

[WCSDancer2010]

So - what was your diagnosis???

 

As I recall, you were convinced you had HSV2 on your chin. And as I recall, we recommended that you call Westover Heights to get more accurate advice, which is what we recommend to anyone who either has something that isn't definitely H or that's not presenting "normally".

 

We NEVER "diagnose" people here. We may give suggestions about what is going on so they can discuss that with their Dr, and suggest that they go to a Dr (like an OBGYN/Infectious Disease specialist, etc) who is more likely to know about how to deal with their particular issues, and we tell them about WH if that isn't getting them anywhere, but we are very clear that we are NOT doctors here.

 

I'm pretty sure they wouldn't have told you you had H on your chin without a swab from the area though on the phone .. so I'm curious to know what her thoughts were???

[SidneySmith]

Respectfully, I do not want to carry on diagnosis questions online as I don't want my peculiar situation to affect others. I, like you, believe first stop should be clinics like the one in Oregon. I do think my first post is balanced and points people in the right direction. However, I disagree with you regarding people on forums like these giving their opinions of a diagnosis. I was on the the web researching for a month and going into forums and too many people were communicating opinions that only a knowledgeable STD doctor should be giving. I would be happy to carry on the discussion offline, but I do not want to post something publicly regarding the results of my discussion with the doctor. Also, I have no flippin' idea why the post appeared twice. If anyone wants to let me know how to take one of them down, I'd be happy to.

[whitedaisies]

This community is a place to share information, this includes medical, emotional, information and "opinions" which is exactly what your doctor gave you. I can also tell you that all the doctors and specialists that I went to alot had no idea about herpes!

 

So , forgive me for being bold, but you are judging people on here without using empathy and compassion for those who come on here scared and unsure and in emotional turmoil. The goal for a site like this is to provide information to people who are struggling and are not getting all the answers from their doctors, or are not getting support from their loved ones. They are in turmoil, and we try to be factual and empathetic and no one here ever tries to diagnose.

 

So I disagree, respectfully, with your words. There is room for everything and your opinion is what worked for you and that's wonderful that it worked for you and you learned something from your experience. No one suggested or is suggesting you go on forums for a personal diagnosis....that was your choice and the choice of each individual. Some people are afraid to go to doctors, some people have lots of anxiety about it, some people are depressed and isolated, and need strength from a site and the people behind it so they have the strength to go to a doctor. There is a path for everyone and I would sincerely appreciate if you would be open to seeing different paths.

 

Thank you

[seeker]

SS you came here looking for help. no one "diagnosed". people offered opinions about what information you offered. you took it and ran. now you come back like a zealot wanting to purge the land and wont even discuss with people? part of helping people is giving your idea of what they may be going thru. last I remember you were given the info for westover on here ( and possibly other places).

 

and asking what yours was isn't "carrying on diagnosis questions" as you put it. what was asked was " what were you told?" im hsv2 positive, theres no question. me telling someone if they ask is not offering a diagnosis nor is how do you deal with bumps, OBs, rejection, etc.

 

methinks you've had some sort of come to jesus moment and now have a bug up your bum.

 

wait, a phone consultation, hmmm doctor can only give back based on what is told so if one skews the info one gets the "diagnosis" one wants.

 

how many times did the doctor say " I cant give a diagnosis over the phone"?

 

no one diagnosed anyone. gave opinions based on personal knowledge and info given and directed to better resources. end of story.

 

so the question is, are you going to turn into a troll and poo-poo everything anyone says?

 

crickey, every post says, you need to get it swabbed or a blood test at some point.

[mr_hopp]

Hey SidneySmith,

 

I'm confused how you think we are diagnosing people here? We make it quite clear that we are a place to get the facts (that are collected from reputable sources) and to share in the healing journey. Anything that has to do with diagnosis or anything medical-related, we always point people to doctors. And thank you for sharing. Seems that we're on the same page about the importance of people going to get properly tested for herpes.

 

P.S. Then there's the unfortunate problem that it seems the majority of doctors who diagnose people are giving the incorrect facts and unfortunately spreading the stigma about herpes! Which reminds me, if everyone could print out these handouts and give them to your local doctors and clinics, that'll help spread the facts:

http://eepurl.com/b4IPP

[SidneySmith]

We can disagree. No harm intended. Nothing taken personally of your criticism of me. I'm OK that you didn't like my post. However there will probably be more than a few like me on this site who will really appreciate the post and call and get professional advice first. Their's room for more than one opinion on this site. I hope we're all OK with that.

[SidneySmith]

Additionally, I wouldn't have paid money to speak to the kind doctor at the clinic in Oregon if it weren't for this site. Thank you. By the way Adrial, I did not like my general practitioner's advice that my positive diagnosis was "Nothing to worry about." He even said disclosure was a "non-issue." So that's why I kept digging and finally ended up at the clinic in Oregon. I do care. For those who think I was looking for a good answer that would fit a future disclosure (which I will), I could have stopped at the advice of my general practitioner and cared not. But I didn't.

[SidneySmith]

:)

[whitedaisies]

No one is arguing about what you did for yourself. You did a good thing, you took your health into your own hands. That's what you should do.

 

It bothered me how you passed judgement on te intentions of this site. I am very protective of these friends on here as well as Adrial although I know he can do it himself. I have never been around such compassionate and wonderful people who share their personal struggles and diagnosis with the selfless intention of helping others. It is the best example of humanity I have ever seen in my life and sometimes is the only place people feel accepted.

 

Cheers

[SidneySmith]

WD - If there is no room for the minority, then the majority just bully their way through every difference of opinion. By the way, this site is based upon the minority opinion that we should not show prejudice towards people with herpes. Adrial's entire movement is about empowering the minority.

[Scared4this]

SS, glad you called westover height as Lisa was the doctor who helped me to get WB test! They are really nice and knowledgeable to herpes especially.

I think ultimately everyone coming to a supportive forum is trying to do that.... Get support on something that we are fearful for, lack of knowledge on, and seeking others with similar symptoms. All the support or advice you get from the internet are in noway to replace to seek a doctor who actually works with you as our bodies works in different ways ( God's mysterious ways). Even the few doctors I seen have different opinions on herpes ! So it is great you are seeking a doctor and a clinic who has great reputation. You are clear on your plan to get to the real diagnosis. These are all positive and responsible steps.

As for getting info in the forum or internet.... I am grateful for them! If it wasn't for some very helpful posts and people, I wouldn't even learned about western blot test. Inaddition, reading everyone stories and kindness they shown meant the world to me when I was at the darkest moment. So I do agree that people have to get to a right and good doctor to ensure they been diagnosed correctly but they also need to seek out help and support during and after the process. There is no conflict of interest at all :).

Hope all is well and God bless, S

[whitedaisies]

Ss I don't know what u r implying bc I don't understand ur intention but I choose not to reply.

[seeker]

Sidney, im confused. while im glad that you found the information you needed, which by the way you obtained thru people on these forums sending you that way. you disparage the idea of a supposed diagnosis from a forum ( which didn't really occur) yet state that you were utterly confused because of the myriad number of differing responses. now ive not read every post here let alone elsewhere but no one ever said "you have A" they said based on my experience and what I understand it could be A,B,C,or D but you should go get swabbed, blood test, look into WH etc. so why all the vitriol? we were trying to help you cope with an issue that for most people can be devastating. I believe we even stated that GPs and such are woefully under educated about this, something you allude to in your post. your OP was confrontational at the least, maybe a reread on your part would help you understand why the reactions were what they were. I know I wish you nothing but the best, whatever your situation.

[SidneySmith]

"Even if you are a minority of one, the truth is the truth." Mahatma Gandhi

 

[whitedaisies]

Disagree.

 

Being a Minority does not justify an incorrect interpretation of fact.

Clinging onto the belief that beig a minority justifies self righteous judgment is incorrect and I would think Ghandho would agree. You are misquoting him and the intention behind his quote.

 

Again good luck to you. I will not read anymore of this thread nor comment on it. It is really counterproductive and undermines the honest and genuine intentions of the people behind this site.

 

[willow]

This forum, sates on the homepage: Support.

and if it werent for @Adrial's forum of support, i wouldnt be here.

i agree with @seeker, i think maybe you have misunderstood everyones intentions here.

The only thing anyone has ever tried to be forcefull with here, is to see a doc, or change docs.

the idea of this website is to change focus... from "herpes ruined my life" to "i have herpes, no big deal".

And as @whitedaisies stated, i believe u have misquoted Gandhi.

Exactly what are u attempting to imply here? That u are the minority? And that u are right? What are u right about?

You are correct of the health information u posted, but wrong in thinking all the people here are trying to diagnose u!

 

Anywho, Sidney, i am relieved you were able to find the help u needed from W.O.H.,

and if you have questions or concerns that u would like other peoples attitude, experience, and opinion on, be sure to come back!!!

 

[WCSDancer2010]

@SidneySmith

 

"Even if you are a minority of one, the truth is the truth." Mahatma Gandhi

 

TRUTH: Blood tests cannot tell you where the virus is located

 

TRUTH: A positive blood test of 4.0 that soon after your first encounter (2 months previous) would *normally* be considered to be indicative that you got it at least 3-4 months prior to the encounter (ie, before your encounter).

 

TRUTH: You said your Dr said "You have Herpes". He didn't say WHERE and you said the lesion was too dried up to swab. So there is no way to know what the lesion is/was. And any doctor that tells you otherwise isn't worth their salt. You cannot diagnose Herpes by a visual exam. Period.

 

TRUTH: When it was obvious that you were still concerned I suggested you talk to the people at Westover Heights and gave you the info of how to contact them.

 

We only told you that it was *highly unlikely* that the zit was H2 .... when the odds are less than 1% (and that is for truly ORAL H2 ... anywhere else the odds are lower) I think that's a fair statement. But we never, EVER tried to diagnose you and when you continued to express concern and kept questioning I suggested that you contact WH so that your fears could be laid to rest.

 

And you said above you would talk about what they said at WH in a private conversation but you have yet to reply to my request (I'm genuinely curious about what they had to say).

 

So please, if you are going to keep quoting Ghandi, then please be forthcoming and explain to us about how you are in the minority... and how the WH doctors came to their conclusion.

 

Peace

[seeker]

um, I went to the lab and got the test before I came here, as did myriad numbers of others. just read their posts and stop being a narcissist, last im saying on this. let the thread die. its becoming a feed the troll thing. seeker out.

[Newlook2013]

Hi Sidney, it ws after my diagnosis and subsequent test confirmation that I tried to look for support and that was how I found this forum.( althought I googled a bit when I got my first rash, bcos I had no idear what was going on)

A lot of people including you ( SS) came here bcos you didn't know what to do or didn't know what was going on...and you were advised to do "what u finally did".

 

No one came here for diagnosis.

and no one here diagnosed u with hsv2 on your chin.

 

I just copied what u said in ur second post ( @ Don't Let this Happen to You!) below:

 

" Thanks for caring. I have been

diagnosed with HSV2 on my chin"

 

I love u Sidney.

 

 

[SidneySmith]

To clarify, I was diagnosed with HSV2 on after a bad outbreak on my chin right below lip by my original general practitioner after an Igg, who did not think my getting the virus was a big deal at all. In fact, when I asked him how I should disclose a facial outbreak of HSV2 he said, "It's not an issue. The chances of you having another outbreak are very slim."

 

I went on forums because I was uncomfortable with his answer. I wanted to educate myself in regards to having integrity with future disclosures. So I went to forums with questions and was surprisingly informed by some (not all) that facial HSV2 was pretty much impossible to acquire and the level of my antibodies after two months made it pretty much impossible it was a fresh infection. So the logical alternative answer for Sidney's life must have been that I or my ex carried the virus during our 20 year marriage and neither of us ever had an outbreak while we were carrying the virus?

 

Seemed a little implausible for TWO people to have ZERO for 20 years. One person? Ok. But two people who had a healthy sex life... nothing. A little more implausible. So what's the possible alternative, we ask?

 

Post divorce the ONLY woman three years later probably gave me the bug. I had all the physical symptoms a short while after my encounter with her: Achy joints, three weeks of the flu, and what felt like a "fire" of nerve pain on my back for a month. I work out a lot and knew my body wasn't right.

 

So the bottom line is this: After I spoke to the doctor in Washington she concurred it was a highly, highly probable I had a "fresh" HSV2 outbreak on my face because of my specific circumstances, AND the level of antibodies in my system after two months of 4.0 WERE NOT TOO HIGH to eliminate a fresh infection. Background, I had an open lesion on my chin after I cut myself shaving and then had oral sex (How dumb was that?), no intercourse. My first outbreak with pretty much in the same location as to where I was bleeding. She said they are seeing more and more people exposed to HSV2 up here and down there at the same time.

 

However, we both agreed that the chances of having another outbreak on my chin are very slim because the chin is a dry area - not where HSV likes to manifest itself. However, if I do get an outbreak, RUN, DON'T WALK and get it swabbed. So, six to eight weeks later I have yet to have another outbreak, so life goes on.

 

I hadn't dated in 23 years and it never occurred to me that someone I had spoken to over 100 hours on the phone before meeting up with her would be hiding a little secret. NO ONE IS TO BLAME BUT ME. I should have asked, but to tell you the truth she is a model and I believe she is in the "Image Protection Program" and would have been insulted if I has made the inquiry.

 

Last, when I confronted her about my condition, she flat out ignored me. I know everyone does not think like me, but if someone told me they had a fresh infection of HSV after being intimate with them and I thought I was clean, I would say, "What the H**ll are you talking about? Now I have to get tested because of you?"

 

In Sidney's gut, her silence spoke volumes. HOWEVER, NO ONE IS TO BLAME BUT ME. So now I have a new dating motto . . . "If this wonderful person you have met seems to good to be true, they probably are." That's just my motto . . . feel free to use it - no credit necessary.

 

Last, there have been many "last words" exchanged regarding my posts by people in this forum. THIS post is purely informational SO PLEASE DO NOT RESPOND WITH THE LAST WORD. Nowhere in this post have I called anyone out so please read and then keep showing love and kindness to others as you do on a daily basis. If my information helps with other people's post, great.

 

Peace, strength, and a shed-less, outbreak free life to all! And to all a goodnight!

[SidneySmith]

:)

[SidneySmith]

:)