I don't want to cry anymore.. So I'm venting

[Mg0301]

I'm so sick of crying. I'm happy during the day and then I get home and get in bed and I just start crying. I just hate feeling this way. I've read countless success stories and I have gotten encouragement from family and friends. But nothing helps. And it doesn't help that my OBs are internal and haven't gone away! It's been a month. They come and go and come and go. How can I heal with this physical crap still happening? And this guy, oh god this guy I'm really starting to like him.

I miss my happiness.

 

[whitedaisies]

I hear you...big hug to you!

 

It's a good thing you are really starting to like a guy....I know it brings up a lot of conflicting feelings, but how wonderful it is that you met someone you feel that way about. You are very lucky.

 

Maybe you should try suppressive therapy if you are not on it already to help with the symptoms.

 

Your happiness will come back, but diferent things might make you happy, simpler things.

 

I feel like my outbreaks are internal as well....how can you tell they are....what symptoms are you experiencing? How do you know they aren't gone away?

 

Hugs to you

 

xo

[Mg0301]

Thanks whitedaises. It's good and bad that I'm liking this guy.. Yeah he's great but I'm scared he won't accept me.

 

I have that yeast infection, uncomfortable feeling. It slightly burns when I urinate and I have a little discharge. I ran all STD and other tests to make sure nothing else is the cause. All came back negative so it has to be H. I looked up online that these can be common symptoms of internal OBs... Especially of all else is rules out.

 

Doc doesn't want me on suppressives unless I get 5 or more outbreaks a year. I'm taking acyclovir right now and I have two more refills left.

If there is still a problem this upcoming month, I might request suppressives.

 

What symptoms do you experience?

[Scared4this]

U should go to ur obgyn and have it caked out. They can see your cervix and see if you have any OB going on and test the type if u don't know yet. Your obgyn can also test thru your discharge to see if any herpes infection is happening at the moment too. Hope this helps so u don't need to wonder if this is H that's causing the symptoms.

 

God bless, S

[whitedaisies]

Go get swabbed internally when u have symptoms. So u know for sure

 

Xo

[WCSDancer2010]

@Mg0301

 

So I'm assuming you live in the UK then if the Dr is making you have 5 OB's to consider suppressive therapy? Tell him you will string his ass up if he doesn't give you the supressives so you can protect your partner (ok , he's not one yet, but sometimes you have to play the game with the Dr's to get what you NEED) ... and if he doesn't and your partner gets it, you will (and I am not into litigation) SUE his ass for any lost work/medical expenses your BF may have due to the OB's. Let them know you have been a whole month in OB ... and that isn't cool when you need to work or are in a relationship ;)

 

SMH ... sorry but it drives me nuts when these Dr's follow these stupid guidelines that are SO counter-productive to protecting our partners.

 

i also agree - ask them to check you internally when you are having symptoms ... if you need to, go in every week until they give you the meds :p

 

and (((HUGS))) ... keep busy and keep coming here ... and just realize that there are many of us who have had H for the majority of our lives and we are doing fine ... and you will too. Patience friend!

[Mg0301]

Hey Dancer,

No, I actually live in the U.S lol. maybe I wasn't as clear as I should have been about my OBs with my doctor. I'm going to finish this bottle of acyclovir that I have and if I'm still breaking out, I'll go request the suppressives.

[WCSDancer2010]

Ok - I assumed the UK because that is standard practice over there :(

 

If he won't give it to you, go to Planned Parenthood or and STD clinic ...

 

BTW, are you seeing a GP or OBGYN? If it's a GP, don't bother going to him about your "Lady Issues" any more ... get thee to an OBGYN .. IMO GP's shouldn't be practicing in ... er... that "area" because it's becoming so specialized and they are usually waaay behind the times on their info :P

[whitedaisies]

@scared4this....and @Dancer

 

how can swabbing discharge prove you have a herpes infection....isn't the discharge a symptom of the infection and not the infection itself?

 

Just wondering b/c I had my discharge swabbed and it came back negative and I swear that was my 2nd outbreak!

 

Just wondering!

[WCSDancer2010]

If you have an open blister or lesion then it would be shedding into the vagina and that would hopefully show up in the discharge...a lot would depend on what point of the OB you are at.

 

Did they test the discharge for anything else this time around?

[whitedaisies]

This was back in February when I had a whole lot o stuff going on. My discharge was yellow and watery very uncommon for me and he got a good sample of it so there would be enough discharge but don't know if the virus was in it and I guess it wasn't bc it came back negative.

I did it within the required 48 hour period.

 

Last time I had a swab was a month ago she swabbed a repetitive red area on the outside of opening of my vagina. Negative!!!!!

 

I feel like I am a private detective trying to solve a murder mystery. This is exhausting and I wouldn't be so obsessed with the pursuit if my symptom weren't so severe and constant.

 

I will go in again and see if they can do a run for bacteria and yeast again by swabbing inside of my cervix along with hsv. If everything comes up negative I throw my hands up in the air and surrender!!!!

[whitedaisies]

I think I hijacked this thread....sorry.

 

 

[whitedaisies]

It's not that. Thanks. I don't have anything appear on Vuvukva area.