Looking for a push

[Ashley]

Hi All,

 

It's been quite some time since I have been active on the forum. I am happy to report that things have been going well in my life. I can say that a lot of the barriers I have been facing these past couple years have been knocked down. Although it’s a process, I am learning to accept that this is reality and herpes doesn’t seem like such a big deal anymore. After a tough two years, I have had lots of happiness and success in all aspects of my life.

 

I took a bit of a hiatus from the dating world but this summer I found myself back in the game. I started seeing a guy that I had known in a previous life, however, it turns out we weren’t right for each other and I ended it. We never had sex and so I never disclosed. There is a lot of talk about herpes being a wing-man on here and I never fully understood what that meant until that relationship. In the past, I probably would have slept with him a lot sooner and perhaps been stuck in a relationship that wasn’t going anywhere.

 

Around the time I broke up with the summer boy, I met another guy. After one hour of conversation our connection was apparent. I’m talking butterflies in the stomach kind of connection. He is kind, smart, successful, funny and attractive. And the best part is, he thinks I’m all those things too. Did I mention he lives two provinces away and we’ve already been on three dates! He’s been very accepting of some pretty heavy stuff I’ve told him, but I’m still scared he won’t be accepting of my H friend. I am not ready to have sex yet but I think I will be in the near future. I’m so scared to tell him as this would be my first disclosure.

 

Any advice on disclosure is welcome. I think I’m just looking for someone to tell me to do it. So please, tell me to do it!

[WCSDancer2010]

@Ashley

 

Just Doooooooo Iiiiiiiiiittttttt!!! LOL

 

My best advice is to read all the success stories that you can ... you will see a common thread in that most were petrified beforehand and relieved after ;)

 

Remember that H is your Wingman ... that if he thinks you are that valuable to him, he will take time to become educated before he chooses whether this is a deal breaker for him (Just as he may have to go off and think if he wanted to stay if you said you were infertile, had a mental illness, a recovering alcoholic, or whatever.)

 

And glad that H helped you to dodge that other bullet ;)

 

Also, check these links out to help you to gain a more rounded perspective of the Disclosure conversation ....

 

http://supporttruthanddialog.com/when-should-i-disclose/

http://supporttruthanddialog.com/disclosure-its-not-just-about-herpes/

 

When to have the H talk Adrial

[forgivenessandpeace]

@Ashley Rooting for you! I wish you sooo much courage and self-confidence. Keep us posted!

[Jennie]

We are all chanting "do it do it do it!"(;

 

[willow]

As nike said. "Just do it" !!!!!