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freaking out

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Hi guys! I'm a long time lurker but I've never posted. I'm 27 and I've had H2 for a couple years, after someone I was with failed to tell me he had it. Anyways, I forgave him, forgave myself, have accepted my fate, and am thankful the outbreaks are few and far between, and when they do happen they're very mild.


So I've met someone! Ah! Someone amazing, and perfect for me. There's already been talks of the future, even a mention of marriage! and it hasnt been very long! And I can feel myself falling for him, which naturally freaks me right out, and makes me want to run in the opposite direction. I'm completely terrified of disclosing to him. Our relationship really is taking off, and we did have a very passionate make out session the other night, for the first time. He's very compassionate, empathetic, and understanding, but I can't help but constantly fantasize about the worst case scenario. I'm almost anticipating a rejection, so I've been savoring every single moment I have with him before I have to tell him. I know he is crazy about me too, which also makes me feel guilty that I haven't told him yet.


I know now is the time and I shouldn't wait any longer. I've scoured the forums, and reading them all has been so helpful. I just need words of encouragement! Is anyone in a happy, healthy, long term relationship after disclosing? I'm so scared it makes me want to cry!

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Hello and Welcome!


Congratulations!!!! Of course you feel nervous and that's ok.


My advice is that you read all the Success Stories that you can. There is a wealth of wisdom in there where you can learn from the experiences of others. We'll be here to back you up, so when the time comes, remember we will all be cheering you on!!!


These links may also help ...






When to have the H talk Adrial
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In a similar situation and I'M DRAGGING IT OUT!!! Just don't do this is all I can say. You're beginning something wonderful for you whatever the outcome. I'm where you are right now and there's a great thread with info on how positive disclosure can be from whitedaisies right above this one. Gives me a lot of perspective. Good luck!

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Thanks I'll have to check it out. Every time I'm with him its just so amazing that I can't bring myselg to tell him. We have talked about sex, but our relationship hasn't gotten sexual yet at all. I'm just so afraid of ruining this amazing thing, which would hurt and suck and I try not to let my feelings get ahead of me because of H. If anything, H has made me way more picky with guys I'll date and with this one I really can see myself with him.

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We'll then u need to build ur confidence.....how do u do that?......


1) read successful disclosure stories

2) practice ur disclosure

3) be prepared and have copies of stats of transmission etc ready

4) perhaps talk about sthng else with him that u feel vulnerable about and see how he handles it....if you feel he handled that situation well....gives u more confidence to disclose at a later date

5) no one can guarantee the outcome of a disclosure but the key is to be sincere and your wonderful self


Good luck. Xoxoxo

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Update! Omg I did it!!!!!! And it was SUCCESSFUL! I am so ecstatic!!!!!!!!!


It was like an out of body experience! Things started getting a little hot and heavy after our wonderful date, so I just said before we get too sexual I have to tell you that I have h2. I told him the risks, and my experience from how I got it to what happens. I remained so calm, the person that told him was not me!!!


And you know what he said?! "So what, do you not want me to go down on you? I'm still going to love you." And we had the most amazing night!! Ahhh I'm so happy, thank you guys so much for all the support!!!!!!

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