Have always had HSV1 orally, now either have HSV2 or am having HSV1 OBs downstairs

[sanngrior]

I have had oral herpes (type 1) my whole life, and it hasn't been an issue. I'm sure I got it from a relative, and since I always had it I was never really ashamed of it. I thought it looked gross, sure, but I generally had 1 or 2 OBs a year, only consisting of one cold sore. Pretty mild. I have told everyone I dated about it, and to my knowledge only one of those people who previously didn't have it got it from me. He wasn't mad about it.

 

Earlier this week I came home from work and my behind was pretty itchy. I wear waders at my job, so its not uncommon for me to get monkey butt from sweating in them all day. I went for the hydrocortisone, but when I put it on I felt some bumps. After looking in the mirror and doing a little googling, I was pretty sure I had some mild sacral herpes bumps.

 

I went to urgent care, and held it together until I got into the visiting room, but then starting crying. My doctor was actually really awesome - she was hilarious, talking about herpes just being "a pain in the butt" and not a serious medical concern. We talked about how funny it was that I was having an OB in my butt even though I have never had anal sex. She confirmed that it was definitely herpes and took a swab - though she was uncertain if we would be able to tell what type it was, as none of the sores were open. She also told me "we are going to suppress the shit out of this - don't worry" which made me laugh. I started dating someone new about a month ago, and we had sex (with protection) the night before my OB. There is a small amount of evidence that taking valtrax soon after being exposed to herpes can prevent you from getting it, so I got a prescription for him, as well as one to keep my OB from getting worse.

 

I really like this guy I have been dating. He is incredibly kind, kind of a weirdo, and really funny. When we first started dating I got an STD test for pretty much everything, and came back as negative for everything but the HSV1. I told him about the HSV1, and he told me he didn't care at all. We have been having (really good!) sex, but have been really good about using condoms every time.

 

So as soon as I got done at the Dr.s, I went over to tell him. I'm sure I didn't do it in the best way - basically cried and said everything in about 30 seconds. He just sort of held me and tried to comfort me - told me that everything was going to be alright. I was really surprised and asked him "How are you not freaking out about this?" he replied "Yeah, it sucks. But its not like either of us are going to die from this." We got his valtrax prescription filled (my pharmacy was closed, so I had to wait until the next day to fill mine) and hung out for a little bit longer. I told him to get tested before he decided to keep dating me or not, and I would let him know what type it was when I got my results back.

 

So my thoughts on this are as follows. There is a chance that my immune system is slacking, and I am having an HSV1 OB despite already having it orally. There is also the possibility that my new boyfriend unknowingly has it and gave it to me. The final possibility is that I have had it for a while (It has been a while since my last partner), had a false negative, and then shortly after had an OB.

 

I'm not really mad at whoever might have given it to me. I am more mad that despite taking all the proper precautions (getting STD tests, using condoms, not sleeping with more than one person at any given time) I now have it. I would be incredibly mad at myself if I gave it to my new boyfriend - although I realize that is being a bit harsh with myself as I honestly wouldn't be mad if I found out he gave it to me not knowing he had it. We are both working a lot the next few days, but hopefully will be carving pumpkins tomorrow night. Depending on if we are able to get some alone time (he lives with 5 other people) I plan on talking with him about both when he should get tested (2-3 weeks from now, right?) as well as the transmission rates if I continue to take valtrax and we continue to use condoms.

 

I am terrified he will decide he doesn't want to date me. I won't be mad at him - it is a perfectly logical choice if he doesn't have it. But we were friends the whole summer before we started dating, and his friend group are pretty much my only friends in town (I moved here last May not knowing anyone). If he doesn't want to date me, I'm afraid things will be awkward and I will basically not have any friends. I'm afraid his friends will ask why we broke up after everything has been going so well. I'm trying not to think to about it until he gets tested and I get my test results back, but its hard!

 

Has anyone else had a similar experience where they had an OB shortly after testing negative? Or has anyone had an experience where they had an HSV1 OB downstairs after knowing they had it orally? What about finding out you had it shortly into a new relationship?

 

Sorry for the novel!

[WCSDancer2010]

There is a chance that my immune system is slacking, and I am having an HSV1 OB despite already having it orally.

 

Nope. At least, the HSV1 on your mouth wouldn't have had traveled to your southern region. Wherever you get H, is where it stays ... it lives in the nerves, not the blood, so it only affects the area where it originally settles. Now, it's *possible* you got it down there from oral sex, but given the area, it's doubtful that it's HSV1 (unless you have some sort of interesting kink where the guy orally stimulates you there...LOL ;) )

 

So - it *sounds* like you have a visual diagnosis at the moment...which is NOT a diagnosis ... unless/until you have a positive swab or blood test, it *could* be many things. Maybe your washing machine didn't properly rinse your underwear and all the sweating caused a contact dermatitis of some sort. There are many different things that it could be, especially given your negative status and the location. Did you get the Swab result?

 

When exactly was your last sexual contact before the current guy? It should take 3-4 months for a positive result to show up so if it was a month ago you need to re-test in about 2-3 months. It's possible, but less likely that you would have had a full on OB 24 hrs after you had sex... so I don't think you got it from your current guy.

 

I'm not convinced that you have H.... too many things are not lining up... but you might as well re-test in a few months... make sure they type test so you know the variety you have as well as what the numbers are as there are a number of false positives between a result of 1.1 and 3.5 ...

 

(((HUGS)))

[sanngrior]

I should have been more clear - even though I had an OB a night after having sex, that was not the first I had sex with my boyfriend. We have been sleeping together since we started dating about a month ago. No anal sex though - and we have used condoms every time. He is pretty generous with oral sex (no complaints there) but nothing goes on with the backdoor. Looking back on it, we should have used dental dams! Is it possible that he kissed me, I was shedding HSV1 on my mouth, and then he transferred the virus when he went down on me?

 

My last sexual contact before my current boyfriend was 3 months ago - so it is possible that I got it from that person and there wasn't enough time to test positive with the blood test. We did not have sex, but there was some naked cuddling going on.

 

I will get the swab result either today or Monday. If that comes back negative, I plan on getting a blood test where they type and get the numbers.

 

When should my boyfriend get tested? If I've had it all this time, he could have been exposed to it through shedding. With condom use, the the chance of him contracting it without me having an outbreak is about 4%? Is that right? And while I didn't know of having an outbreak when we had sex the other night, it is very likely I was shedding or maybe didn't notice the beginning of the outbreak. Even with condom use, that would up the chance of him contracting it a little bit more, right?

 

Ahh! There are so many conflicting statistics out there, so many that are unclear. I am a biologist (wildlife, not medical) so I understand a lot of the terminology, I just don't know which sources are legitimate!

[whitedaisies]

Use the sources here. Yet are from reputable sources like CDC etc.

 

Good luck. Xo

[WCSDancer2010]

Well it's *possible* you got HSV1 from your BF from the oral sex but not from him kissing you then going down on you ... it really takes skin on skin contact to pass on .. so it's possible that he already has HSV1 and passed it to you... HOWEVER, it's rare as you already will have the antibodies for HSV1 so your body should have fought it off. It's not unheard of, but it's rare that people get HSV1 genitally/down south after they have an established oral version.

 

You also shouldn't have got it from naked cuddling unless the person had a real OB going on and you maintained contact/rubbed the area ... if you did some grinding in the area then it's possible that you got it that way :/

 

With condom use, the the chance of him contracting it without me having an outbreak is about 4%? Is that right?

 

Regarding condoms - your OB's on the sacrum... the condom doesn't cover that area, so it's not a lot of use for protecting him from an OB in that area :(

 

The facts here are all from reputable sources .... Westover Heights, CDC, MedHelp, and Dr Peter Leone (well known Herpes specialist) ... check out the handouts, e-book, and video link below for info to help you understand the Herpes facts :)

 

(((HUGS)))

 

Handouts + disclosure e-book:

http://eepurl.com/b4IPP

 

Herpes facts video