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having such a hard time and new to herpes

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And again ... for all you ladies .. Herpes just showed you that those guys were not the MEN you thought they were... they are still boys who have not grown up. A MAN would at least get educated and support you even if they felt uneasy about staying in the relationship if they were H- ... and those who gave it to you (if they were MEN) would man-up and accept responsibility. Who would want to live with someone like that? Because that would eventually show itself, and by that time you might have been more deeply invested, or have a child together. Be thankful that H showed you their true colors :/

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I'm sorry we all have to go through this! It makes me so sad to know everything will forever be changed.... My main focus in life has always been to be a wife and mom and I just feel like it's not fair that this could be put in my way to have that! It's so hard because if finding the right person wasn't hard enough! It's a lot to handle!

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how you present it to someone is SO important. and i know its hard, its terrifying being diagnosed and I couldnt even think about it without sobbing for a few days. But if you don't present it as scary they take it way better. I got it from my current boyfriend and when I told him about it i gave him all the statistics (i have genital hsv1, which at least 60% of the population already have antibodies too). He got tested and it was already in his blood. I was positive from a culture test so boom I figured out how I got it. I also had a really intense initial outbreak so I figured i had been a recent exposure case.


I hope you feel better soon, get on some antivirals to ease your symptoms for now and just breathe. I'm only 23 too and wanted to die when I found out. But life goes on. Its more common than you think. And if your giver doesn't take it well dont take it personally. i had to kinda imagine how I would react to someone saying they had it that I was dating to figure out exactly what to say to him to disclose. if you need someone to talk to about it im here!


also get a blood test- the type of herpes can present itself in pretty different mannerisms SOMETIMES. its a virus so nothings concrete....but I personally had one outbreak last march and havent had one since. So besides knowing I have it, my life hasnt been affected in any other way. at all.

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So do you have HSV1 or 2?


And H won't stop you from getting married or having kids. as I said I've had it 35 yrs and have 2 beautiful daughers (28 and 25). I was *blessed* with HSV1 orally as well as a kid .. so I have to be doubly "careful" but even so, it just meant minor adjustments in my life and besides my now ex-hubby (who got it becaue I didn't know what my "rash" was at the time) noone has got it from me... friends, family, or lovers ;)


Knowledge is power. The vast majority get it from someone who doesn't know they have it. When you are diagnosed you know to pay attention to your body and your health... and that alone goes a LONG way to keeping your partner safe :)

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I believe I have 2 but like I said swab results have not come back but I plan on getting a blood test this week knowing obviously it's most liky not in my blood yet. The Epsom salt baths have been a huge relief for me! And me working 65 hours a week has been tough to get a ton of rest but I have stopped working out for the time being and am taking a lot of vitamins. I hope he takes responsibility and does man up and we can talk about this but idk....... I truly believe he didn't know so im still trying to come up with the words to say to him..... But I also want to have hard facts positive or negative! Even know I'm pretty positive of a result I didn't have any issues until we had sex

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Certainly your time frame fits a typical first OB ... did you have oral sex? If so, it's a distinct possibility that's what you have ... which sadly occurs because most people have no idea they got it as a kid and we are not tested for it ... and given 80% don't have symptoms, it's just a numbers game about who gets unlucky and gets it over time :(


Once you have the result we'll help you to figure out what you will say, ok?

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Just remember you can only go up from here. Things will truly get better. There will be days, many days, where you will forget you even have it because life will go back to normal and everything will be the same. This is all still new to you, as it is for me also, so there will be moments where you'll think about it and get upset, but its just a phase I promise, and you will accept it and it will no longer be this curse or dark secret to hold from everyone. So keep your head up, and remember we are your support whenever you need it. :)

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Yeah, herpes is definitely an expensive condition. My meds ran me almost $200 before my insurance kicked in. Valtrex is pricey and there is no generic for it, but you can take Acyclovir its more affordable and it works just as good. The only difference between the two is the concentration and how it is absorbed into the body, so you take Valtrex less (1gram every 8 hours) than you would need to take Acyclovir (400 mg every few hours). The lab work was about $275 altogether. So I feel your pain. Planned Parenthood wasn't too expensive and they do things on a sliding scale so if you ever need more treatment its a good option to check out.



Also, if you have a Costco or Sam's Club in your area, they sell medication at wholesale price. I got about 60 pills for $12 bucks at Costco because I'm a member there. Even if you're not a member you can still go to their pharmacy and get it far cheaper than CVS or Walgreens!

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I have refills also. That's awesome though, the health department was where I went initially and they gave me Acyclovir. It worked great I just hated that I had to take it every 4 hours. Valtrex is definitely easier to take but since its a stronger dose it upsets my stomach, even when I take it with food, so I only take it as needed. Have you had any issues with it?

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Test results come up with "values". The standard Elissa values are considered "negative" up to 1.0 .. >1.1 is often considered to the "positive" by Drs but reality is anything between 1.1-3.5 can have a 40% false positive rate ... so th advice with that result is that if the person has no OB's at all, do the Western Blot test (which you have to do privately...but it is waay more accurate) ... if you have OB's then anything over 1.1 would be clear enough as a positive result.

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