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Found that to be rather odd and unexpected...


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Posted

After ending our relationship, It was time for my annual exam with my doctor. He did the usual and I received the news I was infected with the virus, both HSV 1&2... I literally had a panic attack and for three days didn't know what to do or who to turn too until I finally just picked the phone up and dialed... My best friend, Matty. Not only was he supportive, he was encouraging and even came with me to my counseling appointment. I then felt I wanted to talk to my dearest friend, and I was horrified by her reaction. She looked at me with complete disgust and gave me a speech on how I should have know better.

 

Background, my ex and I were together for a long time and he decided to step out and be with someone else while I was working lots of OT. We had a great relationship, until the last two months when I found out he first cheated and that's all it took and we used protection the entire relationship except the last few weeks, but by then it was to late.

 

Getting back to my point, its helped me being able to open up and talk about this even though its very new, less than one month. My male friends have been more supportive and actually showing sincerity when they talk with me while disclosing such personal information to my best female friends who we've shared everything with for years, I now get looked at like I'm no good and they don't seem as interested in our friendship. Maybe its me, but I would have assumed the complete opposite reaction. Woman really are brutal and it doesn't seem to matter how strong the bond once was.

 

Makes you wonder who's really there for you and who your true friends are. Yet for the most part, as woman, we pre judge men and don't give them credit... To those men who are the good ones, Thank you!

Posted

Hey Sassy, sorry to hear about your girlfriends. I was terrified to tell my girlfriends anyone. And I am so happy that I got lucky and no one has looked at me different. The only guy besides my giver I told was my cousin and he was amazingly compassionate. I have yet to disclose to a guy friend. I hope I get lucky like you that they are good to me. Just know that it's not you. It is them and their ignorance. Sadly they probably don't know anything about it besides the negative stigma which is perpetuated. You are amazing and brave and I get all that from your clever screen name. Welcome!!

Posted

Thank you. I figured I can be down in the dumps or learn as much as I can and move forward. I've realized many of the people I know have never been tested for the virus, only the basic STD's which can be handled by antibiotics. So, I decided why not become proactive and use this diagnosis to my advantage and do something positive. Being I was in school for Psychology as my minor, I think if I gather more information maybe I can raise awareness in my hometown and get people to test more frequently and not feel ashamed. Ive only told my close friends but slowly its part of who I am now, so love all of me or none of me. That's their loss as I see it. We need positive reinforcements, not people who only make it worse. Guys are a hit or miss and risky when telling, but for the most part have suprised me. Hoping things go well for you dohm21

Posted

I still have not told a girlfriend. It is sad, but I don't have a girlfriend I feel I can confide in. I do not want to be judged or pitied. This site has meant a lot.

Posted

Atlantic, that's the worst feeling... I told my coworker who I'm pretty close too and she was in disbelief but has been asking lots of questions. She is younger and she heard many negative things and I been explaining a lot to her. She hasn't treated me differently and appreciates me being open about it. She is now going to be tested as well.

 

Wish we had a support group locally for females and I heard of one in another state that did girls night out, but was for woman with HSV to get together and share experiences. I'm thinking of getting one started in my area once a month.

 

Its a great feeling being able to have someone close...

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