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My own words...

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"I would tell anyone who asked or sought out my advice, 'It's always easier to do the thing that isn't right for you, the thing that doesn't make you truly happy. It's harder to do the thing that is right for you, the thing that you don't yet know will make you happiest because of your fear. Your fear to put in the work and maybe failing. Your fear of the unknown. It's always stepping outside of our comfort zone and challenging ourselves that we grow and live a more fulfilling life.' With that said, I better start listening to my own advice."




I was pondering a discussion that my friend and I had the other day. She had called me to talk about her budding relationship and how she was already aggrivated by the idea of women flirting with him. I told her to hold on and think about what the hell she was saying. "I would say that there is no reason to get worked up so early. It's as if all is right in the world when you guys were dating vs being officiated. No one knows that you two are together, who knows when they were friends on that thing. Why look into it? There's no reason to. Let it be a relationship where you can be optomistic and happy. And if you're afaid to get hurt? Guess what? Not living life is the only thing that will not hurt us. But then really does it? The longing for connection would hurt us. And you gotta live because you're still breathing."


The fact of the matter was that her insecurity had not left, it still lingered and it was easy for it to get the best of her. It's easy for it to get the best of us. She needed to acknowledge its presence and accept it. I told her that as her friend, she should consider letting the powers at be, be. That there was no reason for her to question her man, her relationship, or herself. "It's always easiier to do the thing that isn't right for you..." She realized that she was trying to sabotoge something before it became anything else out of her fear. She told me that she's going to try her best to let go and let it be a relationship that isn't driven by her insecurities.


When I think about my path and how that it has evolved which makes me insecure, I need to learn to let go. I need to do the things that will take time and will take work to live a more fulfilling life. Because I know as much as God does, I am not happy. Do we live in fear and live in a life of insecure security? Or do we rise up above that to become better, to live a life of higher purpose? I would like to work on having higer purpose.


Good day everyone!

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Reminds me of the question of where we put our power? Do we give it away to everyone and everything around us or do we allow it to stay with us? Do we look to others for validation or do we already know ourselves to be enough? It's these kinds of situations that you describe where if we looked at them with a more curious and aware lens, we could learn a whole lot more about ourselves. It's fascinating to consider as we grow more and more and get to know ourselves more and more.

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Thanks Diversity and Adrial, these are the type of posts I love reading. It inspires growth and self awareness.


I know even before the H I had my insecurities, but wow I've never actually tried to let them go.


Diversity I am so proud of you for saying you will let these things go. After reading Adrials response, and asking those questions.... I find myself wanting to do the same. This will be a challenge, but it will be worth it to live a more fulfilling life.



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    How can having "the talk" actually create MORE intimacy & connection?

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