Jump to content
  • Want to be a part of a supportive community? Join the H Opp community for free.

    Welcome to the Herpes Opportunity Support Forum! We are a supportive and positive group to help you discover and live your Opportunity. Together, we can shed the shame and embrace vulnerability and true connection. Because who you are is more important than what you have. Get your free e-book and handouts here: https://www.herpesopportunity.com/lp/ebook

I feel like the rest of my life can finally begin


Recommended Posts

I have been absent from the forums lately. Playing at the dating game, with minimal success. I created another dating profile (meeting local guys in my small community is SO TOUGH!). I made this one this time around without any disclosure. I had had a successful disclosure earlier this year, when embarking on a purely "No Strings" relationship, one which ended on a positive note when he moved away. I missed an opportunity to disclose a few months back as well, when the long distance became too much of an issue for both of us.

 

And then I met Loma. Hardworking, family oriented, kind, an incredible sense of humor, and blue eyes that just don't quit. I'm tearing up even as I type this because I disclosed. With my heart in my throat, I dropped the H-Bomb on him. And he responded immediately with "I don't care". Ever since my diagnosis, I felt so determined to persevere, when truthfully I felt as if a significant portion of my life had been put on "Pause", that there were certain parts of it that may never get back on track. And I was attempting to come up with my "Plan B", in the event that maybe I wouldn't find the right one.

 

But he doesn't care. And even with numerous discussions since that recent first one, he has proven time and again that he doesn't care. He went home and did his research on his own, and immediately called me to tell me that he had, and that he still doesn't care. In his words "Most people have some form of it already, and even with that slight chance that I may get it, it still means that I am with you, and always will be. And that's worth more than worrying about this little bit of nothing. Because that's all this is, NOTHING".

 

We just had our first sleep over. And H never even crossed my mind, not even once, as we began to get to know each other on the physical level. And until deciding to take to the forums today, H ceases to even cross my mind around him. He has helped me to give it greater insignificance as our actual relationship takes greater significance. With Loma, I don't feel like just another H statistic anymore, I feel like a woman, the woman I feared I had lost. For the first time in longer than I can remember, I am feeling one thing only: JOY.

 

I will update again later.

Link to comment

With Loma, I don't feel like just another H statistic anymore, I feel like a woman, the woman I feared I had lost. For the first time in longer than I can remember, I am feeling one thing only: JOY.

 

So you DO know now that she was never "lost", right? This is what I wish I could convey to all the newly diagnosed who believe that their relationship/dating life is "over". You are exactly who you were before diagnosis .. with a little hitchhiker that you didn't ask for ... that's all ... and a person who sees your beauty and who REALLY values that over their fears, their prejudices, their (previous) ignorance won't let a little virus get between you :)

 

So happy for you friend! Thank you for checking in and giving us another Success Story!!!

 

 

(((HUGS)))

 

 

Link to comment

Our first date was on May 23. We immediately clicked, so I sort of started gearing myself up for it right then, having a feeling that this one could work. I didn't feel totally positive 100% of the time, but who does? I disclosed on the evening of June 6 when he came over to keep me company during one of my migraines. I opened by telling him that I felt we were developing a really good thing. One that I hoped was going to continue for a long long time. So I told him that I felt if he were to know "the very worst possible thing about me" and be ok with that, that we'd have a fighting chance. So he said "okay, hit me with it". So I H-Bombed him and he didn't even flinch, just replied with a shrug and a "So? Is that supposed to change my mind? Because it doesn't."

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...