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HSV2 for 28 years, F


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2 months later...and I am still in the closet with my diagnosis...not sure if I will ever be free enough to just talk about and say the actual h word...it is definitely the stigma surrounding it holding me back....time heals so I'm sure eventually all will be fine

 

I started a new diet, I just hope it doesn't interfere with h...it seems well balanced with organic as much as possible.

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@2Legit2Quit......I disclosed along the line

 

I have contracted an incurable skin disease in my gential area....we are certain I've had it for decades....whether stress, poor nutrition, other things can make it flair up....I'm sure you have it, if I see it on you, I will go with you to the doctors and ask for proper testing and help you manage it.(husband)

Like it or not, I handed it the best way I knew how considering his telegraph mouth, and not sure he fully gets its h.

Affair, same thing only I told him he should seek std testing for it for him and his wife...he is a nurse....if he didn't get it based on that, that was his prompt to ask me further questions and I would not of lied....he didn't ask...didn't speak to me for a while after that but he's back.

 

I had a biopsy done several years ago on my leg, it was lichen...a skin spot brought on by stress...another manageable skin condition...very rarely do I see it but when I do I just call the dr for cream...I suppose h is along this line, only sexually transmitted and huge stigma

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Just a vent...I'm sure this has already been addressed onsite, but I don't have too much time to surf for it, so I'll just vent away ;)

 

So today in my infinite wisdom I decided to call the cdc...stds are reported correct? I wanted the statistics...I wanted to know if my case would be reported...i was told no...hsv1 nor hsv2 was reported...I honestly don't understand the reasoning behind it, and I went round and round with the lady on the phone (I already know it's like they read from a script)...I even said hsv2 is a sexually transmitted disease but yet, it's non reportable, it's not on the usual screening, but as patients we are responsible for disclosure? To prevent something the medical community and the CDC view as no big deal?

 

Vent over urgh

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Tonite I had dinner, for the first time in several months, with someone very close to my heart for a very long time...my high school sweetheart, we dated all thru high school, our relationship ended 2 years after high school, but our trust and friendship is unbreakable...we took each others virginity, broke up, got back together....it was during the breakup I have concluded that one of us contracted h.

 

He said his wife has it, but blamed her ex because another of his exs has it...he has not been tested...he only remembers seeing one small rash in the gential area about 10 years ago.

He shared with me he was diagnosed with hep c and is being treated.

Next time he goes for bloodwork he is asking for hsv test.

 

I said the actual word herpes in my dialogue with him, that kind of slapped me in the face with who I am trusting of....I told him about my husbands comment about h (above), about how I described it to him but not sure hubby gets it.

 

He is computer illiterate but had the same response I have seen and heard here...

He loves me...it shouldn't be a concern between 2 people that care and or love one another, there are ways around it...he shook his head about my hubby and kindly asked me to re evaluate things....if I can't trust him enough to sit and talk with him, like I am now, there is a problem. He said people that love you will accept, those that can't need to go.

 

It was a breathe of fresh air to be able to talk about it, and be me! Not the professional side, not the mom side, not the wife side, but to just be.....me

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He believes from a tattoo, the owner of the shop passed on from a herion overdose, the public was unaware of his addiction and thought it was a safe shop, I did not ask him specific questions about if he saw the needles come out of the package or if they were already loaded.

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First - I suggest you get tested for Hep C if you have not already... just in case. Odds are you are ok, but if you think you got H from him, perhaps its just smart to check on Hep C.

 

Second, regarding the earlier rant: Notifiable diseases generally are the ones that can kill you or do severe damage (ie, Syphilis can cause brain damage). Herpes is seen as a "nuisance skin condition". That's the reasoning about Notifying.... also, people often won't go for testing if they think they have a Notifiable disease ... so it's a mixed blessing to have a disease in the Notifiable list ;p

 

Thirds: I agree with your friend:

 

he shook his head about my hubby and kindly asked me to re evaluate things....if I can't trust him enough to sit and talk with him, like I am now, there is a problem. He said people that love you will accept, those that can't need to go.

 

Very valid point - but only YOU can figure out what you need to do. :)

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So I just want to share something about healthy eating since we are supposed to really be caring for our bodies....

I am vegetarian, have been for a few years and before that ate meat, but sparingly..

I am not perfect, was eating sweets once in a while, a soda maybe 2 times per week, but did organic when possible with some slips.

 

Over the past 3 weeks I have cut out a lot of food choices...I ate not one sweet, drank nothing but water or water flavored with real fruit (infused)....fruits, veggies, sprouted grain bread, organic items, nothing with artificial anything in it, no processed cheese...and I was full.

 

Sat I was out with friends, caved and had pizza, soda..then decided I was a roll would add cool whip and jello.....a bowel of cereal later that night (sugar pops)....not an awful lot of food, but not good healthy food my body was used to....this am...sick...all day...tumbling belly, just felt awful.

 

Moral...eat healthy when you can, that junk is really not good.

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I've been reading a lot about the stigma, and just wanted to share;

I belong to a site for several years now where people go to chat, they are kind of in the same boat I am in (with marriage)

There is a lady in there, for years, that has been very open about her herpes status...before she even takes someone offline to her yahoo, she reveals her hsv2 status....she doesn't want to lead anyone on without knowing...although most I chatted with admired her courage, all of them said they wouldn't go any further with her than chat.."she must of had used bad judgement" etc....ironically I even stuck up for her for being so open upfront and honest.

This is not where I am at yet, but she displayed great courage.

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Wow .. So guys were saying they wouldn't ever give her a Chance past chatting, because of H? Just remember, I was a highly paranoid person about STDs. Said I'd never be w someone who had one, but I actually married someone w genital warts. Often times we think and say we'd not do something, when we've not met an incredible person that may have what we've always deemed a deal breaker. People are shit yalkers and often say what they don't really even know to be true for sure, until they are in that situation.

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Yes that is correct, every man I chatted with, that previously chatted with her...openly discussed her disclosure with me(which is wrong) and said they would not go past chatting due to h.

 

Like youself, I was highly paranoid about stds too, I thought by making sure they had an std panel or were blood donors, I was safe...hpv1,2 or hpv never even crossed my mind until diagnosis time...it was just never s thought, only blood born pathogens...and to be honest, I've ran into so much lies and deceit, you really don't know how to trust (except long time friends)

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Just a need to vent....(maybe I need start blogging although I wouldn't know where to go or how to start)

So maybe h is helping to open up my eyes...not sure it will slow me down for good, but it has certainly slowed me down for now...

I'm on fb again tonite and I peaked over at my affairs page...on it again was him and his wife...happy, smiling, and she writes under it "he is so wonderful"

Gosh i wanted to puke...not sure why I even look...but all I keep thinking is

Wonderful? He's telling me he loves me, wants to f""k me, might of transmitted h, oh but he's a gem!!!

Double standard I know, because I have been no better.

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I also have a few questions that I posed in other threads along the way but would like to discuss and clarify

Can vigorous rubbing without penetration transmit h.....I had an encounter about a year ago and he did not enter me but had vigorous rubbing gential to gential for hours

Also....another used his hand on me for very very long time...and had an unusual breakout on his hand and arms that lasted weeks with scarring from itching....could I have transmitted h2 ? No entering me either.

Just having a hard time on who I need to discuss my status with....so far I've discussed it with hubby and current affair, in a round about way. I'm slowly getting there.

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