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Confuse, Depress, and isolated.


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Hello,

 

I'm quite new to this since I recently found out I have herpes four days ago through a blood test. At first I was so confuse on how, I was later depress (still am) because I feel like I loss my sense of freedom, and isolated because I pushed and avoided everyone who showed kindness due to fear.

 

I broke up with my boyfriend, who does not have herpes of any kind, because I didn't want him to be in constant fear with my conditions, protecting him if you will, even though he disagree with it I don't want him near me because of the disgust I feel about myself.

 

I have both oral and genital herpes and my doctor mentioned that I had herpes for a long time now and that I am asymptomatic. I never had any symptoms of any kind and I was so confused that I didn't want to believe it. I asked for a another test but he said there is no use since it will be the same, positive.

 

I'm very upset. I feel broken. I'm literally falling apart. I lost hope and I'm about to lose my mind.

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Hey Serene.

Welcome. You came to the right place. I know it can be a scary thing but it is more common than you know right now. Even if you have herpes, you absolutely deserve to be loved. It may be best to kind of deal with this on your own first. Become a bit stronger and then give your boyfriend a chance. Odds are he has already come into contact with herpes before and probably will again. So what made you get tested if you are asymptomatic? Also, how are you sure your boyfriend doesn't have it too?

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Can you please post the results of that test, because I have a sneaking suspicion, that they put you in fkr a combined test and/or values are so low, they can be a false positive w no symptoms. Please post vakuses w test type, so we can review please. If the did a combined test, this would cross react w HSV 2 test, if you have oral herpes, which pretty much everyone had by the time they're adults. So lets take a deep breath and figure this out, because you may not even have genital herpes.

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Honey - you need to get to an OBGYN or Planned Parenthood (GP's and PCP's are often VERY behind on the latest info on Herpes!) because I am very suspicious of those results .... Ask for type specific ...

 

Also, given you have no symptoms if your result is under 3.5, then you need to take the Western Blot test because 40% of people with a positive result under 3.5, who don't have symptoms, actually are false positive. The normal test only tests for 1 protein, the WB tests for 16 . .... you would have to special order it from Westover Heights Clinic.

 

Now, IF you do have Herpes, you will be FINE my friend. 80% of people have HSV1 orally (60% of young people have it by young adulthood) ... 15%+ have genital herpes .... (50% of women age 50yrs who are dating have it) ...

 

IE: It's VERY common.

 

I got HSV1 at 4 yrs ... HSV2 at my first sexual experience at age 17. Didn't know about the second one till I was married (gave it to my ex ... we split after 20 yrs for other reasons) ... Been in 2 relationships with HSV- partners. Had 2 beautiful H- daughters. And had a VERY normal life. And you can too. You just need to know the facts and get educated (which is more than I had to go on when I got it!).

 

Let us know your results, and we can go from there. And call that BF and let him back into your life. Please. Herpes is not worth breaking up with him over... IF you have it.

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@WCSDancer2010 I wish I could take the Western Blot test but unfortunately, I am not from the States. I know that the results looks very sketchy but there is nothing I can do as I ask the doctor (the third one I've seen) said that there is no specific type IgG test as they are, as I quote, "all the same". So I didn't retake the test.

 

The question I have now is... Now what? I don't know whether I have it or not. What do I do with this ambiguity?

 

The thing is I do doubt the results. I've only slept with 2 men in my life (I'm very selective) and the previous one was about 5 years ago and the recent doesn't have herpes. So How could have contracted herpes and not know for 5 years with no outbreaks? And knowing now that I might have herpes.. I still don't have any outbreaks I've been stress, emotional, and sick.

 

Does anyone have any answers? Please Help.

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You need to go to a GYNO and request a type specific IgG Elisa test, not a combined test. It looks like a combined test, from what you posted, which if you have oral herpes, which most of us do by the time we're adults, it would cross react w the type two test, since it is combined. Your doctors are ignorant z stating there's no other tests. May I ask where you're located? That may help, as Dancer has lived over sea's before. I have too, but I've yet to meet anyone who lives in the country I lived in, on this site. If you are in the UK, she can better advise you.

 

I question those results and think there's a most likely chance you do not have it.

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The thing is I do doubt the results. I've only slept with 2 men in my life (I'm very selective) and the previous one was about 5 years ago and the recent doesn't have herpes. So How could have contracted herpes and not know for 5 years with no outbreaks? And knowing now that I might have herpes.. I still don't have any outbreaks I've been stress, emotional, and sick.

 

Well, for one thing, 80% of people with Herpes don't know they have it because they never have the symptoms ... and just because you are "selective" doesn't mean you are "safe ...specifically because of that first fact... compounded by the fact that 80% of people have oral Herpes and don't know it and often pass it on via oral sex. We've had VIRGINS with HSV1 genitally and 80yr olds who were new to dating (after a long-term spouse died) get HSV2 from their first time back on the horse with a new partner.

 

That said, I am not convinced by your tests. Are you in the UK? If so someone gave us this info awhile back that may help : join the Herpes Virus Association and pay for a test through them (approx 20 quid membership plus 50 test I think). They also have trusted sites online pharmacies for supressive therapy if needed (again really expensive but I thought it worth mentioning).

 

If not, you just need to stand up to the Dr's and pitch a fit and get the Elissa Type Specific test. Ask them if they are "all the same" why one is HSV1 and the other is HSV2, and why people with HSV1 sometimes later get HSV2.... and tell them you won't leave the office till they set you up for the proper test ... when I lived in the UK I had to pitch a fit (have had to do it a few times here in the USA) to get the treatment/test I needed. Sometimes you just have to let them think you are crazy and get them to write up what you want to get you out of their hair...LOL :)

 

 

 

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