Depressed over breakup and ghsv1

[LoveChild90]

For two years, I dated a wonderful guy. We both got tested for STI's and everything came out negative. About 3 months into the relationship, I got diagnosed with genital hsv1. It was hard at first but it got easier because I still loved the guy and accepted my condition. Fast forward 2 years later, we are broken up. I feel so alone right now. Knowing that I have ghsv1 is really starting to bother me. I don't know if I could ever date again because I'm scared of rejection. I only had 2 outbreaks ever since I've been diagnosed. The Valtrex works for me. How can I move on from here? I still love my ex and I do miss him. It hurts me that we do not talk anymore. I am 25 years old by the way. I really could use some support from this group. It's been a month since we've broken up and I still cry everyday.

[WCSDancer2010]

@LoveChild90

 

Have to keep this short but want you to know you are not alone, you have found an amazing place to get educated and find support.

 

I suggest you read all the Success Stories that you can.... because we have tons of them from H+ who found love with H- partners. Herpes isn't a death sentence ... for you or your love life. I got HSV2 from my first sexual experience at 17 ... at 55 life is pretty damn fine and H has only caused me a few speed bumps in my path of life.

 

Sadly your "STI" test didn't likely include Herpes.... it rarely does here thanks to the idiocy of the CDC's protocol suggestions. Even if it had been and you found out your partner had HSV1, 80% of the population has Oral Herpes.... so if you like oral sex, odds are you are going to have to run the crap shoot unless you use dental dams... because oral sex is so much more prevalent today it's believed that up to 50% of all new Genital cases are H1.

 

Point being: You are FAR from alone. And odds are whoever you may date will have HSV1 one way or another. Just make sure they are actually tested for Herpes when they go for their next test ... because odds are they haven't been.... ;)

 

(((HUGS)))

 

http://herpeslife.com/herpes-forum/discussion/6070/it-gets-better great tips for newbies

 

http://herpeslife.com/herpes-forum/discussion/2886/herpes-yoga-and-self-love

 

 

 

 

[LoveChild90]

Thank you so much WCSDancer. That's exactly how I got it via oral sex. He had an outbreak on his mouth a few months later after my first outbreak. He never had any symptoms before. He felt horrible about giving it to me and he said he would never leave me but things change :(. It sucks that most STI panels do not include herpes. This could have been prevented. I know this will take time for me to get over my ex and to accept my diagnosis.

[WCSDancer2010]

Well, again, with 80% of the population having Oral H1, unless we all give up oral sex, odds are it will keep getting passed on exactly as you got it - from people who don't know they have it or even if they do, they don't recognize the prodromes that may come when they are shedding.

 

When you can accept that sometimes life throws you curve balls and ya gotta just learn how to catch them and own them .... because ducking from them and hiding from reality just causes more pain in the end. We call this the Opportunity because we see so many people grow from this once they get beyond the upset and the grieving and the "why me?". So try to keep that in the back of your mind as you process through the grief stages. This is your chance to become stronger and more self possessed. It may not seem like it right now. Just trust in the process and come here whenever you need support or help :)

[LoveChild90]

Thank you again! I do feel a little bit better by coming to this site and reading the support forums. It gives me a little bit hope that I can live a normal life. Herpes has such a bad stigma to it. It is more a psychological/emotional disease because of the stigma. It's only a skin condition just like chicken pox.