Would you talk to a psychologist about herpes?

[Mikarose]

I've had HSV2 for 6 months now after an unwanted encounter with someone I didn't know

 

Throughout the 6 months its been some of the worst times of my life and I often am so exhausted of this I just want it to end.. but I used to still want to try and be happy and all 'yeah its an opportunity! I can live my life! I am great! This won't stop me!'

 

That mindset has now disappeared and whether it is the incident in which I got the herpes, the herpes itself or just the whole situation.. but its really wearing me down to the point where I have almost no motivation to keep trying to be happy? It just seems pointless??

 

 

My parents want me to see someone about it and I somewhat agree as I'm kind of losing it :D. But I'm scared. Maybe a psychologist will judge me, say it was my own fault, just think I'm yuck, or tell me to get over it and think I'm wasting their time! I also don't feel like retelling the story of how it happened.

 

Is it even the kind of thing you tell these sorts of people? Or is it too much information because they aren't that kind of Doctor and they'll just be thinking 'great now I have to spray the chair with bleach once you leave'? Do you just say you have a problem and ask for some coping mechanisms for the mental/emotional side of it?

 

Has anyone gone to a psychiatrist/psychologist/someone for this and has it helped? Is it worth it?

[Bambina3]

I have seen a psychologist in reference to my diagnosis...unfortunately it was of no help to me, she just listened, really no guidance, and asked the doctor to prescribe me an anxiety med....although I thought it might help, it is masking the underlying issues, they still haven't gone away.

I didn't try seeing someone again after that.

Good luck, hopefully you will find someone to help.

[Scared16]

I would try ... There is crappy psychologists out there and good ones too. Maybe you need some sort of trauma recovery sessions to find yourself. Psychologists don't have the answers for you, they listen and guide you, they encourage you and help you pick yourself up, but eventually it is your work to accept yourself and love yourself ... I think that the talking is great to, because you get to hear yourself ... Somehow you end up sharing more in there than you would with your best friend ... But it has to be a good psychologist that you click with ... And no, nobody will wipe the chair when you leave silly :-) ... This is just in your head :-). I personally think yeast infection and BV are way grosser than an H OB. For most people H is nothing, it is just that there is no cure. You are still wonderful and you are the same person you were before. You just need a little bit of help in realizing that and loving yourself as much or even more than before :-).

[ihaveittoo]

Another option you can look into is a herpes support group.

 

http://herpeslife.com/herpes-support-groups/. Hopefully there is one near you. If not contact your local planned parenthood clinic, they may have one or know of one near you.

 

I first attended a meeting 20 years ago. There were people there from many different backgrounds and experience with herpes. They will have the latest info and everyone there will have experience and knowledge you can learn from.

 

You are on the right track in seeking out some kind of help. This forum is a great place to start.

[whitedaisies]

Support groups are a good option.

 

I see a psychotherapist. The key to progressing in therapy is the relationship between your therapist and yourself. It may take a few tries to find the right one. I lucked out and got a great one on the first Try.

 

Sometimes if u see a psychologist they just focus on meds to try to make u feel better. And you may need some temporarily but u also need therapy.

 

If your family is telling you you need one and you are feelinf it too then go for it. I tell mine everything and the good ones are not judgmental at all.

 

Good luck

[hippyherpy]

Getting an outside perspective from someone who is not an active player in the story of your life can help sometimes as it would seem to provide a certain objectivity.

[desertlove]

I think you should give it a try. If your psychologist judges you then find a new one. Mine was super nice and understanding. Didn't guide me much, listen mostly, but did provide tips and made me reflect on things which was good too. Perhaps a life coach. They are supposed to guide you more and help you plan towards a healthier life. Also, I agree with Scared16, perhaps some sort of trauma recovery would be good too. Hang in there

[StillMeButWiser]

The key is to find one who gives you tools and teaches you how to use the tool. One who just sits and listens asking constantly how does that make you feel won't work. One who sticks to the goal every week. You can even go twice a week. Some therapist specialize in certain areas like domestic violence or sex sbuse. Maybe for you if it fits sex abuse then touch base with one on herpes. Can't do two different therapies at once. Won't work. Working out your frustration with not wanting the encounter and understanding how, why and not your fault is the best first approach . After coming to peace with that will help you with herpes. Sometimes meds is used simotaniously. Baby steps will get you the the finish line. Good luck.

[Bebe]

I was on my way to my old therapist when I found out. I def told ther! You just have to feel comfortable with that person and have a relationship where you know you can talk about anything! It takes time to find a therapist sometimes, it's truly like dating, but you'll find someone! Good luck!

[SunDevourer]

Wow, this is a hard case of the Debbie downers. I think any therapist that We're to do what you described would be awful people to see. Not even worth your time. You can see a therapist, counselor, spiritual adviser, but what is it you want them to tell you? The quick fix and hacks to life?

They are not their to do all the work for you.

Do you, or would you want a therapist to say those things? That it's your fault, you're gross and that you are a waste of time? Seems like if that's what you've been trying to convince yourself is the truth, but don't whole hearted believe that. really though, if you found a therapist like that it's either some rough motivation Techniques, or a very bad therapist. No one should be listening to that.

 

When tragic, or alarming things that happen to use that bring us into another reality we aren't comfortable with.. It can be difficult. We become broken-hearted for lack of enthusiasm, confidence, and the like.whether it's how you acquired it, what it really means to have herpes, and the whole situation itself. I think it comes down to realizing how we aren't perfect, but maintain false pretenses on what perfection is and if we are not that there is 100 ways and books out there to give us an idea how to be the most identical to it. But change happens. To be perfect is to become stagnant like a puddle of water and never changing like rivers, mind you that have a direction. Change is inevitable.

 

So when change happens to you. Do you bend or break? And if you are broken, what pieces do you keep and what do you toss away that no longer is of use to you?

 

 

[Mikarose]

Just want to thank everyone for the replies. I read them back when I initially posted this and was too anxious to form a response haha. I often feel ok about the whole thing and in times like that I do my best to ignore anything that reminds me!

 

I have booked a (very expensive!!) session with a lady who is supposed to be experienced in exactly my issues and many more so I'm hopeful it will be useful!!