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thats the one to get....

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I recently disclosed to someone who asked for a second chance. I was scared and embarrassed along with every other emotion imaginable to someone who was diagnosed 4 months ago. I gave the person time to soak in what was said.....finally the result......I was told "herpes, well if youre gonna get an std, that's the one to get, hahahaha".......

No idiot, I thought to myself, but I smiled cause quite honestly I had no idea how to react. Needless to say that I see why H and disclosure is not a bad thing after all. I still cry and I still try to see the positive, even when my inner girl says otherwise, but I know that if someone could start off being supportive but make jokes after what was said, then that person is not for me.

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Well I tell people all the time that Herpes is a great Wingman because it will show you the true nature of the person when you disclose to them.


That said, I kinda see where they were coming from. Herpes is mostly a pain in the ... ahem... for most people, and nothing else as long as managed carefully. It won't give you cancer and it won't make you infertile. So it shows that they "get" that Herpes isn't a big deal. So I don't see that as a "negative" reaction. But if that kind of reaction makes *you* feel uncomfortable then perhaps this person isn't for you.... and without H it may have been months or years before you realized that otherwise.... good thing then that you had your Wingman to out the guy! :)



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I love that response lol. Like WCSDancer was saying, it shows that he knows that herpes is not truly that big of a deal. I have had casual conversations with people who have said horrible things that make me terrified to disclose. Hearing his reaction makes ME feel a lot more hopeful. As you said, you are probably still carrying a lot of negative emotions and feeding into the negative stigma out there. That's expected in my opinion. Over time you will get back to loving and accepting yourself! This just seems like you're rejecting yourself so deeply that you're unable to see when someone else is accepting you! (I've also been there). *hugs* it gets better :)

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