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It's now been six months since my diagnosis and six months since the last time I had sex.


My question relates specifically to hsv-1. I'm wondering if I can expect to have an outbreak every time I have sex from here on in. At 63, I doubt that'll be too often but I have to admit it's a fear which has been causing me some irrational thinking.


I'm aware of the "statistics" that are available, but I'm more interested in hearing from the perspective of someone who's in the same boat.........


Can anyone shed any light?

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I've already discussed that with my doctor who isn't ready to recommend it unless I'm having regular outbreaks. Since I haven't had sex yet there have been no further outbreaks but I'm a little afraid of what will happen if I do have sex, so I'm avoiding it - which continues the cycle ...... A vicious circle

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I would suggest a lot of lubrication and condoms to start. That way you are offering a bit of protection and at the same time lessening the friction that can bring on an outbreak (lube). I used to get outbreaks after sex but it was usually when it was rough or I had become dry, friction does tend to irritate herpes in my experience. Add in the fact that you have not had sex in awhile, it very well may irritate you.


If you were to have irritation, I don't think it would instantly make the area contagious. I don't really know, but I'm guessing the virus has to travel etc. I don't know if your fear is transmitting or the outbreak itself? But it's still within your first year, and another outbreak will probably happen eventually anyway. I would try it and see what happens. Life is short, don't let fear hold you back.

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Thanks for your comments. I think it was actually friction which brought on the first outbreak so condoms and lubrication are definitely in my future..... I've never had to use lubrication before so I'm wondering if there is one which is better than the other? I've been seeing someone for a couple of months and we've been taking it slow for various reasons but that may change in the near future and I would really like it to be a positive (no pun intended) experience for both of us.......

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Well you'd want to avoid oil based lubes because they aren't good for condoms and can cause vaginal issues. That leaves you with water based and silicone based. Preference on those depends on application I believe. I think water based ones evaporate quickly and you will possibly have to reapply more so than a silicone based lube which lasts longer. I'm sadly out of date with what's popular these days, but perhaps do a search for the best rated lubrication and go from there?


Share your findings for those of us that may possibly need info in the future haha.

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