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Fairytale Beginning to Ending

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Hey everyone, I'm new here and wanted to share my story. The guy that I was we were together 9 years. I didn't start dating or having sex until I was 20 and he was my first and my first boyfriend. When we met it was great, we waited a year before having sex. We had fun. We traveled, we was always doing something fun together. 3 years after being together, he started acting weird, my gut told me something wasn't right. So I went with my gut. After 3 years of dating I found out he was indeed cheating and had been cheating the entire time we were together.. I broke it off and we stayed apart for 6 months. He kept calling and calling and eventually called one of my family member and they called me and told me he was crying because I would speak to him. I didn't by that and I ignored it. It began to email me. He emailed me this long drawn out email explaining everything. We talked via email for a while before going on a date. 5 more years pasted and he was and emotional roll coaster. It's like when we got back together he changed for the worst, he was verbally and mentally abusive and it got physical twice and was still cheating. He would always put me down and make me feel I was worthless. I cried more than I smiled. I tried to get out of the relationship but it was like something had me hooked. (I'm thinking because he was my first bf and my first is why I couldn't get out, it was like a mental hold) finally after 5 years. Well in 2010, I went for my yearly lady checkup and I was get tested. Ever since 2003 I always had negative results. Well 2010 was a shocker, it came back positive for HPV, if that wasn't worst enough I had a spot on my cervix that looked like cancer. After receiving the news the same day my doctor she asked me to come in so she could biopsy the area. I didn't want to go alone so I told him the results and he freaked. Calling me a lie and telling me that I probably cheated. I couldn't get a word in to explain to him the HPV virus I couldn't even tell him that she needs to do a Biopsy. He hung up on me and I ended up going to the doctor alone. Went in for my biopsy and the results came back negative. What a relief, but she still wanted the spot removed because it didn't look good. Eventually he called and was calm and I explained it to him. A couple of weeks later he decided he would travel with myself and my family for me to go have surgery. After the surgery, he was distant and eventually we broke up. I was hurt. Well in beginning of 2011-2012 he came back asking to look at engagement rings and property to build because he prayed and know that he's ready. We found properties but thank God we didn't buy and we found the ring but i told him let's hold off on getting that. I had a gut feeling at that time something wasn't right. So I acted on that gut feeling I told him something felt off about him. He get upset of course because he said he ready and now I'm not. I told him something wasn't right. Soon after that he text me out of the blue and told me we needed to talk. I knew it was coming. He told me to meet him at a park well when I got there he didn't show, but he began to text me. He told me he has been cheating and still is cheating. He said at that time he had two girls pregnant and that if I could lol pass that we could stay together. I didn't respond. I immediately went Change my number, email address, etc. that day is the day I took my life back, well I thought I was done with him. 2012 I went to my yearly again and told my doctor the entire story, she told me let's start your life over by getting tested again. Keep in mind for the last years I have not had a nothing positive expect for HPV. So she did the test and said she'll call in a few weeks. Well I got the call, everything was negative, but she told me she didn't two extra test that she doesn't normally do and it a test for herpes 1 & 2 and they came back positive. I was numb, after I decided to permanently leave him in the past I ended up taking a bit of him with me. She ask me a few question and him I told her I had felt something on him genital a few times and I made the appointment for him to go get test and he said the doctor said he was nothing. So he was actually lying to me and Intentionally pass on the HSV virus to me. After that I didn't date for 6 years because I am scared I might pass it on to someone else. He was my first and my first boyfriend. I felt hate for him at first, but I couldn't mentally heal hating him. After I forgave him mentally and released the hate I felt a lot better. I have spoken or saw him in 6 years. I'm happy now and able to cope with the fact that I have herpes. LET ME TELL YOU ITS HARD TO FORGIVE when you know someone intentionally gave you a STI.


It's been 5 years since being diagnosed and I have had and OB my doctor told me I may have built up enough antibodies and my body is fighting it off. I do have tingling in my legs. Plus I have sciatica, so the tingling could be either or.

So that's my story. I know staying with him was dumb, but when it's your first it's hard to let go in the beginning but when you finally free yourself it feels awesome.

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