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fooling around


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I know about viral shedding and how it can be spread that way. but I don't know when I'm shedding. And I met a guy. I don't want to tell him because I'm moving cross country in a month. we had a crazy make out session with everything on but our shirts. but would I be okaywith doing that make out session in my underwear? with grinding and all? foreplay? going down on him?

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Herpes is only spread by the infected area coming into skin-to-skin contact (usually with a lot of friction involved), so most fabrics will be enough of a barrier to be safe, but it depends on how skimpy your panties are. ;) And going down on him should be all right if you don't have HSV-2 orally (which only 2% of people with herpes do). In fact, according to Dr. Leone, if you have genital HSV-2, there's so low of a risk of it being passed to the mouth that it's a non-issue. Check out this blog article:

http://herpeslife.com/spreading-genital-herpes-hsv2-from-oral-sex

 

... and this video when Dr. Leone came to our support group:

http://herpeslife.com/doctor-answers-questions-about-genital-herpes-hsv-and-hpv/

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I appreciate your concern about passing it, and I'm also getting the feeling that you're overly paranoid (which tends to happen with all the misinformation and stigma out there). No need to be paranoid, but loving that you're asking the question!

 

If there's no outbreak happening, then you're fine with him "fooling around in your nether regions" ... viral shedding doesn't tend to produce enough of the virus to transmit to a non-mucous-membrane area of the body. And if the guy already has HSV-1 (which 80% of Americans age 14-49 do), then he already has antibodies that would have another layer of protection to make it that much harder for the virus to jump to him.

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