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I think I got herpes about 4 years got from a guy performing oral sex and touching me with his penis. We did not have actually sex. Two years ago I got tested. 1 blood work came back positive another came back negative. One swab came back negative the next positive. I feel terrible. I have often thought about killing myself. I have been married for 12 years. My husband and I split up and this happened. Now we are back together and he still loves me the same. I just have a fear of dying because of this. I have had 3 outbreaks and each time it was one lesion but I often have irriation in my vagina. I have been so upset my hair has fallen out from stress and it has gray. I am just at a lost on how to live with this disease. My skin often burns and I have read this is from having herpes. Please help me. All I do is sleep to keep from thinking about dying from herpes.

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Herpes won't kill you unless you have some sort of seriously complicated medical conditions.

It would be a good idea to talk to a doctor you trust about the virus, your concerns about it, and how it effects you.

Herpes is extremely misunderstood by the vast majority of people, myself included until my diagnosis 7 months ago. You will probably find out there are some misconceptions you weren't aware of.

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You're just in a dark place right now. Never make a permanent decision based on a temporary feeling. It'll be hard to drag yourself out of this slump, but it'll be worth it. I promise. Please please please take care of yourself. If you feel like it's not getting better, I would strongly suggest seeking some professional guidance. This is just a diagnosis, not a death sentence ❤

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