Ugh... caught off guard... need some advice.

[406ForLife]

I'm single, I've had HSV-2 for over 10 years now, and I rarely ever have outbreaks, maybe once every other year, since I'm on Valacyclovir.

 

I am actively dating, and I have a "standing policy" that I tell every woman I'm with, that I won't have sex for at least 30 days.

 

Well, last month, I met the most amazing woman I've ever been with.... unfortunately, she put me on the spot around a week into the "30 day" requirement.... in the second week, while we were making out and talking at my house, she says "So, are you clean?"... I said "what?", and she said do you have any STD's.

 

I wasn't ready for this, so I lied, and said "no".

 

So now I'm in a pickle. I won't have sex without telling her, but I need to find the best way to explain my answer.

 

Do I just fess up, tell her that I lied, because I didn't know her well enough? Or do I say "hey, I decided to get tested, and I actually DO have an infection..."

 

Any advice on how I should approach this, would be greatly appreciated... I don't want to scare her away, but I won't risk her health over this, she needs to know... I just need to get some advice as to how to tell her.

 

Thank you.

[hwomanntexas7]

I would be honest and just tell her that you were caught off guard and not ready to disclose that type of information at that moment but that her asking has made you think about it and decide that you do want to have that conversation.

[RegularGuy]

Well, you already know you should tell her. She has a right to know if you intend to be intimate eventually.

You made a small mistake in the grand scheme of things, and this one is really easy to take back.

It may well result in some negative reactions, but to be honest, it wouldn't be completely unreasonable for a person to feel hurt in that situation.

At very least, you have an opportunity to dovthe right thing. In doing so, you will be showing a level of honesty and courage that us actually pretty rare and that counts vfor something.

Go ahead and get this off your conscience. Sooner is much better than later.