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Stressing myself out

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I’m so stressed . I’ve had hsv2 for 2 1/2 years now and i still think about it everyday . Eventually i want to have a guy in my life but I’m afraid of rejection. And as bad as i want to have sex I’m scared , because of the fact that i would have to tell somebody and what they would think of me. And they way that everybody talks about how bad having herpes is, it makes me even more upset. Nobody asks for this disease . It just makes me really sad and it’s very hard to except,’although i try to except it daily .

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It seems like you're struggling to see yourself as a valuable, desireable person.

You're also letting fear dictate your actions, rather than make your own decisions.

You've erected a series of mental barriers around yourself to be protected from a spectulative theat to your self-image, not realizing you've already surrender that positive self-image to fear.

Your fear of a conversation not being fun.

Your fear of a stranger being too quick to judge.

Your fear of a stranger's opinion harming your own opinion of yourself.

It's a very real thing to experience that kind of inner turmoil, and many people sugfer from it.

But the underlying ordeal is your own self-respect.

How will you know when another person appreciates you or has affection for you, if you don't feel those things for yourself?

Engage yourself in accepting what is fact and defining what is not factual.

Vow to regain your own respect, as many of us are working on doing (myself included).

See yourself as a valuable, desireable, worthy person. Or make the changes you know you need to convince yourself that you are worthy of your own respect.


Facing rejection is not exclusive to those with HSV. No matter the flaw one carries with them, it is a positive self-image which fuels the resilliency to accept rejection and continue to seek companionship. Someone who sees their worth knows there are others out there who will see it, too.

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  • 2 weeks later...

I know how you feel. I've had hsv2 for 4 years and have been single for 2. Since I don't get OB's very often it doesn't really bother me, but I haven't been able to disclose to anyone. I don't want to date because I'll just be thinking of how I'm going to start that conversation. Im not sure I want to risk spreading even if they were ok with it. 

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Hi all! Group hug! I created the Lifestyle Guides to help with all of this. Herpes is less a physical problem and more a psychological one (working through shame and stigma). I created it to be a step-by-step experience to powerfully shift your perspective. I went through deep depression for years until I realized that my depression wasn't really about herpes at all. It was because of my mindset and perspective. And with practice, our mindset and perspective can change. 

Check out the guides here:

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