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Can we totally be safe having sex?


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Hey all, I started dating my gf a few months ago and she has genital herpes. Because of this we have not been intimate. Both of us are afraid of me contracting it. But recently she came up with an idea that would allow us to have sex and be safe but I'm not sure if it would work. Currently she's on Valtrex and said with the use of condoms it would reduce the chances on me contracting herpes. But she also said that I could use a penis sleeve and put a condom over it while still wearing my underwear so only the sleeve is exposed and my pubic area and legs aren't exposed. Would this even make a difference or help lower my risks?

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Well, you are both being way too paranoid about transmission. If you are that worried I would either wait a few more months to make certain she is worth the risk, or you might want to move on. The transmission risk is so low female to male, her on valtrex and you wearing a condom......there's no need for further protection unless you just abstain from sex entirely. You can read the risks in the handout from this website. Yes, there is risk, but you are safer with her knowing she has H and has taken every step to lessen transmission, than you would be with anyone else unless you've witnessed their std testing proof. Lots of people, including myself, have never passed this on and a lot of people opt to just forgo condoms and just take anti viral. Best of luck to you both! Kudos to her for disclosing and you educating yourself on H. It's really not a big deal unless you make it one!

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