Having the talk

[Nitsirk20]

So I was diagnosed with HSV2 about 6 months ago. I was in a relationship when I found out and when I told my boyfriend he completely freaked and we split up. It was devastating. It was a really bad break-up and let’s just say he isn’t the most mature person. (Facebook is the devil) On top of all of this I’m a recovering drug addict. So who knows if I’ve had it for a while from things I’ve done during active addiction and only just recently had my first outbreak, or if I got it from him because he wasn’t very loyal during or relationship. I feel like my life is over. I will never be with anyone ever again. I feel ashamed and less than and disgusting. If my boyfriend who said he loved me completely rejected me then how can anyone new ever accept me. So for the past 6 months I have basically been a hermit. I go to work and then go home. I’ve thought about trying to date again, but then I immediately think about having to tell someone and it’s terrifying. So terrifying that I never even try to talk to anyone. Guys who ask me out I decline every time even if it’s been someone I’m interested in. I completely shut down. All I do is cry. I’m getting more and more depressed. I don’t know what to do about this. I don’t want to let this disease ruin my life. I’ve overcome so much in my life from addiction and come out on the other side, but this has completely crushed my self esteem, spirit, and happiness. I’m sorry this is so long-winded, and if you’ve read this far I really appreciate it. So if anyone has any suggestions I would love to hear them. 

[Christopher C]

Yeah... I got it from my ex gf bout 6 months ago... only the initial outbreak and nothing since then but I feel like a leper now... Met a few girls since then and when they started getting closer to me emotionally I let them know of the situation and poof gone like a fart in the wind LOL... So like you, I just kind of go to work and come home and do my own thing... I reckon I'll get used to it eventually... It's never fun being alone but it is what it is and I didn't ask for this and there's not much I can do about it so I just have to accept it... Christopher

[Nitsirk20]

Lol. I completely understand accepting something. But I don’t want to have to “get used to” being alone. It’s damn near impossible ( for me at least ) to hold on if I can’t see a light at the end of the tunnel. I’m kinda just really hopeless right now. And stressed tf out. 

[Christopher C]

Yeah I hear u... frankly for me I don't know what else to do... I think it's quite possible that it's easier for women to date with HSV-1 or HSV-2 than it is for men... I mean my ex who has HSV-1 who gave it to me, from what I hear out on the streets she's having no problem finding dates and what not... I think men tend to be a little more cavalier about it and willing to take the chance then women are Imo

[Ishmael]

2 hours ago, Nitsirk20 said:

Lol. I completely understand accepting something. But I don’t want to have to “get used to” being alone. It’s damn near impossible ( for me at least ) to hold on if I can’t see a light at the end of the tunnel. I’m kinda just really hopeless right now. And stressed tf out. 

There is absolutely no reason for you to accept the idea of being alone. Accepting that this diagnosis is going to have an effect on you, sure. Allowing yourself to be upset about it. sure. But the idea that because you have herpes you cannot find love just absolutely does not correspond with reality. At all. 

[Ishmael]

Seriously, take some time and do some reading at this website and other forums. You'll find that there are so, so many people who have not only found love, but have truly become more introspective, better people because of this experience.