newly diagnosed Learning to cope

[Jane M]

Hi everyone,

I found out over the summer that I contracted hsv 2. I am learning to deal with it and am grateful for forums like this which have helped me in more ways than I can count. I do have some questions that I am hoping to get some answers, or just opinions about. 

1. What are the odds of a person having had 100 sexual partners, NOT having hsv 2? The person I believe infected me, has had at least 100 partners. He is refusing to be tested, or making all kinds of excuses. I have stopped asking him. I think he has looked at the statistics and would rather not know. I'm just curious as to what you all think his chances are at being negative? It seems almost impossible from what I have read. There is only 1 other possible source partner, and he claims to be negative, although I have not seen his labwork. 

 

2. I started valtrex the day my culture came back positive for hsv 2. When the antibodies finally showed up in the bloodwork, there was a 6.82 igg level. I've been doing additional herbal supplements, praying for healing, strengthening my immune system, and eating well. I also believe in mind over matter, and I've been very positive about healing myself. My results and dates are as follows: 

August 15th 6.82 igg

September 5th 2.42 igg

October 1st 1.19 igg

I've not had any additional outbreak since the first, which was relatively painless and looked like a razor abrasion. I've taken 1 gram of valtrex daily since August 10th, a long with Lysine, olive leaf, oregano oil. I also use a topical mix of melissa oil, peppermint oil, and oregano oil twice a week. These have all been studied by NIH and proven to kill the virus in vitro. I apply this ointment to my genital area with a carrier oil before I go to bed. 

Does the fact that my igg level has dropped drastically in such a short time have any clinical significance as to how contagious I am? If I go back to negative, does this mean I am no longer hsv 2 positive? I do understand that this is supposedly a non-curable condition, but I have some different beliefs that have worked for me in the past. Do the low numbers indicate that I am less likely to transmit? 

 

Thank you all for your help. This has been very difficult and I am trying to wrap my head around this, while not losing faith that anything is possible. 

Janey 

[Ohhey143]

I’m curious about this as well, hope to see some answers!

 

If you need support, this is the right place!!!!!

[Jane M]

@Ohhey143

 

I have follow up visits with an infectious disease doctor specialist soon. I will keep updating. I will take the western blot at 6 months post exposure as well.

[Ohhey143]

What will the infectious disease doctor do? What are you having them look into?

[Jane M]

@Ohhey143

I want his opinion on what these numbers mean in correlation to my viral load, how infectious I may or may not be and if I serorevert to a negative igg, does this mean I am "negative". at the rate it is dropping and all of the things I am doing on top of valtrex, I can't see it NOT becoming negative. My gyn did not want to put me on suppressive therapy but the infectious disease specialist did. He was so good and kind about the whole thing. I was so depressed (literally wanted to blow my brains out when I found out), he made me feel human again. I went through all the feelings "dirty, damaged, tainted, alone for life etc). I don't feel that way now, but I can't go for very long without without thinking about this. Nothing has changed but nothing is the same. He was helpful to me in realizing this is not the end of the world as I know it. I'm still struggling at times.... I am still unsure of why I need to disclose if I am taking valtrex and using condoms, and if these numbers mean anything. The lower the igg the less likely I am to transmit? That's what I am hoping he can help me with. As well as people in this forum, which I am very thankful for 

[Jane M]

@Ohhey143

what is your opinion, the man I believe to have contacted this from has had at least 100 sexual partners. He said he has never been tested for herpes and has had no noticeable symptoms. He is one of two possible people that could have given this to me. With 100 partners, my doctor said it is almost impossible he will not have it. What do you think? 

[agentscully]

What is the carrier oil that you use? Also, how do you apply it; with a roller or on a sterile cotton pad? 

Thanks

[Ohhey143]

The guy I was with denied having h and acted like he got tested and doesn’t have it but he’ll still have unprotected sex with me... This tells me he has it. I only had sex with him in the 3-4 months prior to testing positive to hsv2. I know it was him bc my bloodwork came back negative but the culture of the leision was positive. It’s sad bc he’s probably going to continue passing it just like with your experience 

[Amando]

Hi Jane M

After reading that if you have had 7 sexual partners, the odds dramatically increase of you having H in one form or another,
so having over 100 sexual partners would make it a very high odds of having H.

I can't find where it is but I did read something about the igg levels & how they can flatulate & it said not to read to much into it,
but the more knowledge on this the better, so I think it great that you are chasing answers from infectious disease doctor specialist.

7 hours ago, Ohhey143 said:

The guy I was with denied having h and acted like he got tested and doesn’t have it but he’ll still have unprotected sex with me... This tells me he has it. I only had sex with him in the 3-4 months prior to testing positive to hsv2. I know it was him bc my bloodwork came back negative but the culture of the leision was positive. It’s sad bc he’s probably going to continue passing it just like with your experience 

@Ohhey143 Yes it is very sad that people like him & Jane M's 100+ guy, don't take H seriously & make excuses to be tested & don't care about affecting others but sadly the world is full of these sort of people.

[Jane M]

@Amando

Thank you for taking time to reply. I'm sure he has it, he is just in denial. I need to move forward with the acceptance that it was him. It ultimately doesn't change my situation, but some closure would have been nice. I know what you mean about the numbers and not reading too much into it, but I can't help myself! lol. I think if I see it dropping so drastically, I have hope that I can clear this virus from my body. I know...there is supposedly "no cure", but the immune system is capable of clearing a virus. I wonder how many times we get exposed to viruses that our immune system destroys before we even know what hit us? I have great health insurance (which I do not abuse), so I can chase this thing down with all my available resources and I will! But I can almost guarantee it was him. 100 partners....it's just statistically impossible that he would not have it. 

[Jane M]

@agentscully

I  use coconut oil (which has antiviral properties of it's own). I was using a cotton ball, but now I just use my hand. I of course wash them very well after, butI felt like the cotton was absorbing too much of the oil. I use a raw coconut oil that is cold pressed. It takes a little longer to melt and I mix it and it gives a nice thick coating. Just make sure you sleep on a towel. I don't know if this is helping, but it isn't hurting. If you google "essential oils hsv 2 nih", you will be surprised at the studies done and the results. I did read from a clinic in Germany where people have gone into complete remission after applying melissa oil to their mouth or genital area. Make sure you dilute it, these oil can be very irritating to the skin. I bought Verditas Melissa simplex oil at an organic market. It's got most of the oils that NIH studied. You may find this at your local organic market or online. I did not find it on amazon.  The genital area is not sterile. You don't need to use cotton (which is also not sterile unless you get it from a hospital).  Just wash your hands before and after application. The melissa oil will stain your nails a little, but who cares. lol

[Jane M]

@agentscully @Amando @Ohhey143

I am really struggling with disclosure. I am taking 1 gram of valtrex every day, and my numbers are dropping dramatically. I know morally it is the right thing to do, but the infectious disease doctor told me I do not have to disclose in a casual sex situation. I would have the guy use a condom of course along with my valtrex. There is a less than 1% chance I would pass this on. I don't have a lot of causal sex, but I do have someone that I am in a friends with benefits situation with. I want to tell him, but at the same time, I don't know why I have to. So many people have this, and 80 to 90% of them don't know it, so they are just passing it around and the cycle continues. I know I have it, am acting responsibly and doing all that I can to prevent transmission and protect myself. Nobody has to disclose they have had a cold sore, and all I had was a cold sore in a very rude place. I'm obviously struggling with the entire process as I am still coming to terms with this. I'm in medical school, so I can water this down to it's basic....it is a virus that causes an irritating skin condition. The stigma makes it so much worse. I know all of these things. I just don't know that I need to disclose it. I'm not afraid of rejection, I think I'm just angry that I've been put in a position to have to put my sexual health on display to potential partners. HIV is a different story. I always ask my potential partners to get current HIV tests before we are intimate and nobody has had an issue with that. They don't even include hsv testing in the regular panels, because as my doctor stated "so many people have it and the psychological effects are worse than the condition itself". I can't wrap my mind around the fact that I am obligated to disclose. I don't want to feel ashamed of this, nor will I let anyone shame me because of it, I also don't want to be the spokes-vagina for herpes. You guys are all veterans of this whole thing, so I would really love to hear how you guys handle this. Thank you all! 

[Amando]

Hi

Everyone on here is likely to tell you to disclose but I think we have all been where you are, I know I certainly have.
I admit I had a few casual partners that I did not disclose too.

The chances are low, even lower for a women passing to a man, but same thing comes up in your head,
were you happy that someone done that to you?

I actually think now that the casual encounters or friends with benefits, are good ones to practice disclosing on,
as if they reject you, it doesn't hurt nearly as much as it does, if you care about that person & are hoping for a relationship.

So for me I won't be a hypocrite & tell you not to do something I have done, but guess you have to go with your gut
& do what you think is right!

[Jane M]

@Amando

I appreciate your honesty. It's not as black and white to me as it may seem to others. I think ultimately I would have to disclose, because I don't want my future husband / boyfriend finding the valtrex and asking "what the f*** is this!". lo. Although, it's crossed my mind to say that I have chronic shingles and need valtrex for that. Haha. Life isn't fair and it's best to cooperate with the conditions of life, rather than fight them. This has just been a devastating blow for me. I've had 8 sexual partners my whole life. I felt I was being careful and responsible, and respecting my body. I feel as though I have betrayed my body and myself as a whole. 

[Next step]

@Jane M everything you have expressed is exactly how I have been feeling . I too feel out in an unfair position to put this on display , educate the masses , and face judgement ignorance and rejection . I've been having all kinds of emotions as the guy who I thought gave it to me is much more sexually active and not as educated or responsible in these things as me. It set me back several weeks - I was feeling more confident about approaching this in disclosure and not making it a big deal because I don't think it is . I too speak about it matter of factly but the stigma of others makes me emotional . 

[Jane M]

@Next step

I'm sorry if my post set you back... I think we are all struggling in our own way and I am very new to this. I will tell you, I have disclosed to 2 guys I was dating and they did not care one bit. I didn't  have chemistry with them, but they were more than kind. One man stating "you are beautiful and kind, anyone that rejects for a virus does not deserve you". I just go back and forth with it because hsv 2 is so prevalent. 

[Amando]

1 hour ago, Jane M said:

@Amando

I appreciate your honesty. It's not as black and white to me as it may seem to others. I think ultimately I would have to disclose, because I don't want my future husband / boyfriend finding the valtrex and asking "what the f*** is this!". lo. Although, it's crossed my mind to say that I have chronic shingles and need valtrex for that. Haha. Life isn't fair and it's best to cooperate with the conditions of life, rather than fight them. This has just been a devastating blow for me. I've had 8 sexual partners my whole life. I felt I was being careful and responsible, and respecting my body. I feel as though I have betrayed my body and myself as a whole. 

NO! you have not betrayed yourself in anyway, life has just been cruel, that's all.
It can happen to anyone & it does, as this website shows.
So don't blame yourself, hold your head up high & tell H to go F**k itself,
It won't define you & it won't define me either & it won't define anyone on this site!

Peace, Love & Respect 🙂

 

[Concerned1977]

On 10/2/2018 at 12:22 PM, Jane M said:

Hi everyone,

I found out over the summer that I contracted hsv 2. I am learning to deal with it and am grateful for forums like this which have helped me in more ways than I can count. I do have some questions that I am hoping to get some answers, or just opinions about. 

1. What are the odds of a person having had 100 sexual partners, NOT having hsv 2? The person I believe infected me, has had at least 100 partners. He is refusing to be tested, or making all kinds of excuses. I have stopped asking him. I think he has looked at the statistics and would rather not know. I'm just curious as to what you all think his chances are at being negative? It seems almost impossible from what I have read. There is only 1 other possible source partner, and he claims to be negative, although I have not seen his labwork. 

 

2. I started valtrex the day my culture came back positive for hsv 2. When the antibodies finally showed up in the bloodwork, there was a 6.82 igg level. I've been doing additional herbal supplements, praying for healing, strengthening my immune system, and eating well. I also believe in mind over matter, and I've been very positive about healing myself. My results and dates are as follows: 

August 15th 6.82 igg

September 5th 2.42 igg

October 1st 1.19 igg

I've not had any additional outbreak since the first, which was relatively painless and looked like a razor abrasion. I've taken 1 gram of valtrex daily since August 10th, a long with Lysine, olive leaf, oregano oil. I also use a topical mix of melissa oil, peppermint oil, and oregano oil twice a week. These have all been studied by NIH and proven to kill the virus in vitro. I apply this ointment to my genital area with a carrier oil before I go to bed. 

Does the fact that my igg level has dropped drastically in such a short time have any clinical significance as to how contagious I am? If I go back to negative, does this mean I am no longer hsv 2 positive? I do understand that this is supposedly a non-curable condition, but I have some different beliefs that have worked for me in the past. Do the low numbers indicate that I am less likely to transmit? 

 

Thank you all for your help. This has been very difficult and I am trying to wrap my head around this, while not losing faith that anything is possible. 

Janey 

Hi, how long from exposure till you had cultures tested?  And how long after exposure till your IGG results of 6.82?

[Jane M]

@Concerned1977

July 20th sex w/ with the guy who has slept with 100 people and has yet to be tested 

July 23rd sex with ex boyfriend, I don't think he is positive for herpes. He claims not to be. 

August 4th, sex with Mr 100+ again. 

August 6th, woke up with small sore.

August 7th, had cultured tested

August 10th, culture came back positive. Blood drawn that day. Negative for hsv 2, both igm and igg

August 16th, blood drawn, positive igg 6.82. 

September 5th, hsv 2 igg 2.42

October 1st hsv igg 1.19 

I have been taking 1 gram of valtrex per day since August 10th. 

the earliest date of exposure would have been July 20th, the latest date would have been August 4th. 

 

[Jenn88]

Is your primary dr the one sending u for blood work? I asked my doctor to send me so I could see if my levels are dripping and he refuses. He tells me it doesn’t matter 

[Concerned1977]

2 hours ago, Jane M said:

@Concerned1977

July 20th sex w/ with the guy who has slept with 100 people and has yet to be tested 

July 23rd sex with ex boyfriend, I don't think he is positive for herpes. He claims not to be. 

August 4th, sex with Mr 100+ again. 

August 6th, woke up with small sore.

August 7th, had cultured tested

August 10th, culture came back positive. Blood drawn that day. Negative for hsv 2, both igm and igg

August 16th, blood drawn, positive igg 6.82. 

September 5th, hsv 2 igg 2.42

October 1st hsv igg 1.19 

I have been taking 1 gram of valtrex per day since August 10th. 

the earliest date of exposure would have been July 20th, the latest date would have been August 4th. 

 

Have you had any additional outbreaks since then? 

[Concerned1977]

10 minutes ago, Concerned1977 said:

Have you had any additional outbreaks since then? And if so were they more severe then your first one? 

 

[Jane M]

@Concerned1977

no outbreaks since. I have been on valtrex, lysine, oregano oil, olive leaf etc. I've been doing well since then. I was on a steroid and bumped my valtrex to 2 grams a day as I feared it could precipitate an outbreak. It did not 

[Jane M]

@Concerned1977

regarding the first outbreak. It was so minor. Mg doctor initially thought it was a razor abrasion. The only tell tale sign for me is that it burned during the healing process. Short of that, it was just a nuisance. Not what I have expected. 

[Concerned1977]

18 minutes ago, Jane M said:

@Concerned1977

regarding the first outbreak. It was so minor. Mg doctor initially thought it was a razor abrasion. The only tell tale sign for me is that it burned during the healing process. Short of that, it was just a nuisance. Not what I have expected. 

That was really the same symptoms that I had as well,  one small bump that I thought was a ingrown hair I also had some tingling as well that was my Telltale sign. Im taking oregano oil, multivitamin, lysine, vitamin C, and valtrex. I have ho had any additional outbreaks since first one on Aug 28th.