Jump to content
  • Want to be a part of a supportive community? Join the H Opp community for free.

    Welcome to the Herpes Opportunity Support Forum! We are a supportive and positive group to help you discover and live your Opportunity. Together, we can shed the shame and embrace vulnerability and true connection. Because who you are is more important than what you have. Get your free e-book and handouts here: https://www.herpesopportunity.com/lp/ebook

Everything all at once.

Recommended Posts

*long post alert*


Hey everyone. So last week I found out I have genital herpes. I was devastated/humiliated. I saw little bumps appear  on my pubic hair follicles and since I have sensitive skin I just thought I had ingrown hairs growing or a rash. 


I went to the doctor as my symptoms multiplied within 72hrs to find out I have genital herpes. I was in denial because I have only been with my partner and we've slept together before and I didn't have these symptoms. He had a cold sore on his lip and went down on me AFTER it went away but he says he has been getting them since he was a child.


I believe him. But being 20wks pregnant and dealing with this AND carrying my first born is hard. The baby constantly kicks me and I want to enjoy that instead of thinking about everything else. On top of that I have a yeast infection to so it's breaking me down having to deal with this at once.


I cried mainly because of the pain. My genital herpes looked exactly like the one on the Google photos and I had to take a week off of work because I couldn't walk. The lesions were super painful and I hope no one has experienced symptoms on that magnitude. 


On a good note I still feel hopeful and I found strength in myself that I didn't know I had. I'm 23 and the only thing that's honestly bothering me is that the baby could contract it if I have an outbreak around birth. 


As far as the relationship I still love him. But I don't want to be loved. I felt aggravated towards him because of the pain. Envious because he could go out and enjoy simple movement or being around friends. I just didn't like the fact I couldn't move as much as before. If my vaginal lips touched one another I'd experience sharp pain. My nerves in both my legs started to mess up and it was getting painful to walk. Now the only pain I have is in the bottom of my spine and pelvic bone (but that's from the baby's growth! 🙂 ).


Today we finally went out and I can run and jump again. My belly is getting bigger and I feel happier. But a tiny part of me wants to give up. I told my family it was just my lymph nodes.. I can't bring myself to tell them I have herpes yet. It's only been a week. 


Sorry for the long post but that's literally everything I've been wanting to get off my chest. 


How did you find out you had herpes? Did you experience severe symptoms? And also how do you continue to cope with it? Sorry for the long post/complaining at times. But thank you if you made it this far.

Link to comment

Hi Lotzoh

I'm sorry that you have contracted H

Its hard for most people to deal with discovering they have Herpes but must be even harder when you are pregnant
& all your hormones are all over the place (I am male so obviously can not talk from experience) but it does get a lot better
& easier to deal with this virus for most people.

I guess if you saw your guy with cold sores, you new what he had but like most of us before we contracted this,
were uneducated on the subject.
I think your feelings towards him are pretty normal so don't worry about that at least you are feeling  better now & happier.

In most cases your first OB is the worst so if you have them again, hopefully they will be a lot less severe.

I found out I had Herpes from googling it & then got it clarified at an STI clinic.

My symptoms were a rash that was not severe, I did get painful peeing for a week, think that was the worse thing.

Personally I cope incredibly well, I'm 8 years in & it only really bothered me for the first time this year as I had a rejection from someone I really liked.
Of course all cases are different I get a small OB once a year at worse, I do not take suppressants, I do not eat the right things, so for me its not that hard to deal with.

No post on here is too long or too complaining/moaning/angry or whatever!
You have certainly come to a good place to get support & knowledge.

I wish you & your baby all the luck in life & lots of happiness

  • Like 1
Link to comment


I found out when I went in for routine testing. Then my current boyfriend mentioned he gets cold sores which I feel like he mentioned a bump on his lip 2 years ago,  but I didn’t know it was H. I know I got it from him performing oral on me. He believed as long as he didn’t have an active sore then he wouldn’t spread it, which we now know isn’t completely accurate. I also experienced the yeast infection, headaches, flu- like symptoms & mourned the loss of a baby earlier this year. It’s been one rough year for me, so I completely understand how you feel. 

  • Like 1
Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Create New...