Angry today...

[annalove]

I’m now about a year and a half in...and I’m still finding myself struggling with anger towards my giver.  If you’ve read any of my previous posts, you will know that I am pretty positive 1) who my giver was and 2) that he was aware he had it. 

 I don’t think i would have this anger if i had no idea who had exposed me. But some days I feel this overwhelming fury towards him for taking away my choice. Another thing you might know about my story is this man was at one point a male escort and his now girlfriend has also prostituted herself recently. This is the other source of my anger. I want to expose him. I want to punish him since I have this life long punishment all from choosing to be with him. I take responsibility for my choice to not be 100% protected with him. But some days it just brings tears to my eyes knowing he goes on living his life, not being honest, continuing to expose people. While I make the opposite choice. 

It’s not fair. It’s not right. And I don’t know how to move on from this...

[Amando]

Hi Anna

I think you are better off moving on from thinking about punishing this horrible guy.

Things like that just hold you back, you are positive, so stay in that space, concentrate on a great future,
don't concentrate on shit from the past, just not worth it!

Your right, its not fair or right but one thing I learnt very early in my life is, that life is not fair!
The women that passed this to me, never told me but what ever I do or say to her, it will not make my Herpes go away.
So I chose to be a better person, she is long gone, I moved on & got on with the beautiful roller coaster of life.

I feel your anger but let it go, it will benefit you immensely, hugs!