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messiahsmom1210

Heres my story 🤷🏽‍♀️

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 I have recently been diagnosed with both HSV 1 and 2 on 1/24 and I just informed the guy i was sleeping with before my diagnosis last night. Once I told him my status he was very shocked. He was like "HERPES?!" "Are you serious?!" and I told him I was so sorry and everything he comforted me when i cried and told me "with all due respect, I gotta go" he knew right then and there he needed to get tested. He didnt judge me or disrespect me or none of that he just simply said with all due respect he had to go. Fast forward to the next day, I noticed that he deleted me on snapchat and unfollowed me on instagram and when i seen that it broke my heart cause we had more than just a casual sex thing going on he was really my homie off the strength that ive known him and his family for years. I really cared for him. And I still do whether he know it or not. I havent heard a wors from him since I told him my status and now that he no longer follows me on twitter and instgram i feel like he ghosted me and it hurts. And now that I know my status I feel like things will never ever be the same for me again. I dont even know who I couldve gotten this from 😢 and i find out a year (13 and a half months) to be exact after I had my son. Im stuck on who I couldve contracted this bullshit from and when did i get exposed. I am a wreak and this is my cry for help. 

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You are absolutely not alone. I was recently diagnosed with both as well and I haven't been with anyone in a year, so I was completely at a lose and confused, with no idea who it came from. I try to find ways to push forward this everyday. Some days are better than others right now. 

In regards to the guy you were seeing, I can only imagine your disappointment. But it could also be a blessing in disguise. You don't need people who don't support you and have your back around. 🤷🏽‍♀️

 

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Thank you so much for your response, I really appreciate it. Its been a couple of weeks and im still hurting from this and I still havent heard from the guy i was seeing since i informed him. It took alot of strength for me to get out of bed today and go see my counselors today as well as get pampered afterwords. I am trying to deal with this the best way I can and stay strong for my baby boy who will be 14 months old on Sunday. He is my world. And I worry about him cause I might have had hsv2 while i was pregnant and didnt know it as i said before only God himself knows when i caught this and who I caught it from. I really wish i wouldve been more careful. I hate myself for this so much to to know that i couldve given this to someone else is killing me even more. 😢

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I completely understand how you feel. We share some of the same emotions. I may have also had this when I had my daughter and had no idea. I will never understand why OB's do not test for HSV with pregnancy. Feel comfort in knowing that it was not passed to him. You have to try and find the silver lining where and when you can because this can very easily take you down a dark hole. 

Dont hate yourself. There are SO many people walking around with the same thing and have no idea and that is absolutely worse. That's how we got here. It's hard, I know. Hell I have yet to disclose to anyone at this point. I haven't been able to bring myself to say the words out loud. Thankfully I'm not dating anyone at the moment, but I am trying to prepare myself for when that time comes.

Feel free to message me whenever you want to chat.

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