Yet another big night for me

[nic4897]

So tonight I said goodbye to the person who gave me h. It hurt after nearly 9 yrs of back and forth that had nothing to do with h. It's hard when you stay good friends with your "maker" so to say. But, it was time and in a way .. Now that I've adopted this "love first" attitude.. Coming. I always thought I'd be with him in the end of all others but in a way I've been running from h. Keeping my emotions locked with him and h rather than being open to life and someone else. I've learned sometimes the wrong reasons for staying emotionally locked to someone may be because of h. Here's to life beyond a skin condition and to a life complementary with a more compatible soul. I wish the same for all Of you :)

[Judith]

HI Nic,

 

thanks for your post.Actually i talked yesterday by dinner about it,I have friends who tell me that they together with someone new but they dont think thats the right person to spend longer time.I always ask myself why you waste your time with that person then....you know it will not work out till the end of your life?????But honestly i guess i done the same in the past several times , probably i was scared to be alone ,to have no sex ...not having attencion of somebody .Anyway you realized the reason you broke up was not H, the love was gone and that happend but now you free and sure you need to deal with H but it will make you more sure about the person you meet.You will give more attention and you dont start a relationship with every nice attractiv guy you meet...you will decide more carefully...thats a really good thing...i didnt meet anyone nice since i got H but its because i have a deapper look at myself , H and guys.You will see what i mean.I send you a big hug

[nic4897]

Thank you, Judith! How sweet! Big hugs to you as well! :) So this man and I haven't been in a true relationship in awhile and he moved away a long time ago. It's just that emotionally we have been each others crutches.. If that makes sense. Only I'm very honest and he can manipulate me pretty easily. He's now engaged and never told me although had been contacting me for the past few months. I found out and just said that's it.. No more out of respect for his current other. I suppose the biggest thing for me was that admittedly h created this bond between us and letting him go as my crutch means open space for a long time partner and that's scary I suppose. I do have a date Wednesday night. Looking forward to it. He has h because I went to a dating site for h. I'm open to someone with it or without dont mistake me but them having it does make it easier. Regardless, ill still date the same.. Emotional connection first then everything else... Thanks for responding. Love this great community :) Onto the exciting part.. What to wear Wednesday..

[mr_hopp]

Hey Nic! I see that all the time ... People staying in a relationship and the herpes is the biggest reason they stay together. It's really staying in a relationship because of fear, out of feelings of not being enough, that no one else would possibly want you. But that's all bullshit. There are plenty of amazing people who are attracted to other amazing people, regardless of if they have herpes or not. :) So congrats on getting back on the horse and ridin' it! ;) Enjoy your date ... and enjoy picking out your outfit. ;)