A meeting with myself - Final

[HerryTheHerp]

Captain LaScrew: Well, all the cool viruses are doing drugs, Harry. Wanna start? You wouldn’t want to be the only virus on the block that isn’t doing drugs, now would you? Come on, just one hit of Valtrex a day. No one will ever know. It’ll be our li’l secret.

 

Ears: Oh great, now the fallopian fiddler wants to become a drug pusher. We can now say we’ve heard it all.

 

Mind: Alright, enough. Enough talk about drugs for today. We’ll cross that bridge if we have to but I’m not terribly comfortable having drugs in our system, prescription or otherwise. So everyone. we agree? Harry's welcome to stay here as long as he keeps quiet, doesn't throw too many parties, and helps the heart and soul screen the women we let into our lives from now on?

 

Heart: Agreed.

 

Soul: Agreed.

 

Sacral Nerves: Like I really have a choice.

 

Testicle Twins: Sure, why not.

 

Captain Pierre LaScrew: Fine, but if he messes with me again, I swear I'm going to insist that you drug him back to the 60's. I’m talking so many drugs he’ll make Woodstock look like a Quaker convention.

 

Mind: Deal.

 

Liver: No epithelial cells off my back either way.

 

Lungo Cartilogasian: It's a trap!

 

Mind: Lungo, all those years you spent with Phillip Morris and his gang and you have no room to talk. You lost your voting privileges long ago and are still on probation.

 

Ankle: Alright, I guess. Just as long as he doesn’t pop up in my neighborhood ever again.

 

Thighs: Whatevs.

 

Sphincter: Nope. Not happening. Didn’t like him when he was here the last time. He can kiss my ass.

 

Sir Glutius Maximus: He already did!

 

Pancreas: Do we already have tickets to Paris?

 

Kid Knees: We're going to France! We're going to France!

 

Eyes: Yes, but if we see him hanging around we're going to help Captain LaScrew drug him like he's a bad Miami Vice episode.

 

Ears: Word!

 

Mind: Tongue, Lips, and teeth?

 

Lips: We'll be cool, but if his bitchy cousin messes with us ever again while he's out and about things are gonna get real, real quick.

 

Mrs. Helene Herpes the First: Guys, chill out. I'm not like I used to be. I'll even help you keep my cousin in line as much as I can.

 

Mind: Alright, everyone finally agrees. Now, can we all get some rest? We have a long day in front of us and I need to get to sleep because I just realized what a nut house this place really is.

 

Testicle Twins: Finally! Did you all hear that? He’s giving up. 36 years and we’re finally in charge of things around here! Our day has come! We’d like to thank the Academy, the legs for supporting us all these years, Fruit of the Loom for giving us a creative space to do our work, and the hands for scratching us when the going got rough. We promise we won’t let you guys down!

 

Mind: Liver, where’s that bottle? I’m gonna need a drink.