Laylaaa

Update - he didn’t even have herpes just a rash from sex - also still a an a**hole. Told me I was a risk he didn’t want to take any more after ignoring me for a whole week. But Thankyou for all the help and support. I was having a hard time dealing with the thought that someone would have left me for this but it turns out it wasn’t what I thought after all!

i recently got diagnosed with the HSV virus after a one night stand of unprotected sex on holiday. Finding out i had it was tough but then i met someone. I disclosed straight away that i had herpes and he was extremely understanding and amazingly supportive of it when i told him. I asked him if i had ever given it to him would he leave me as there is a risk he can always get it and he said no and continued to be supportive. Unfortunately some symptoms showed up for him and then surprisingly went away - he never bothered to get checked despite me telling him too. And despite me suggesting otherwise he proceeded to have unprotected sex with me. All of a sudden i had zero contact with him he wouldnt talk to me and when i finally got through to him to he told me to leave him alone. I gave him some space but a few days had gone by with no word and i demanded an explanation - to then find out he has gotten some seriously obvious symptoms again and was going to the doctors and never wanted me to speak to him again. I feel awful and overly guilty and extremely heart broken by some of the horrible things he has said to me i know he wants nothing to do with me but i know how it feels to go through this and i want to help as much as i can but i know it wont change anything now. when i found out i had herpes i honestly thought it would be so hard to find someone who would want to be with me with the risk and the first person who i have been with has now left me for it... i have never felt so much shame and guilt for giving someone herpes despite everything i obviously wish this never happened and we were still together but my emotions are so confused and conflicted and all over the place at the moment i dont know what to do or what to think, being told i had herpes was a horrible unwanting feeling but to have someone actually reject you and blame you for it is even worse. Has anyone experienced this before or have any support or ideas on how to get through this?