Spellsinginghippie

I got all the handouts, etc. But thank you! I appreciate it. I'm not sure who gave it to me. I've narrowed it down to two guys - one hasn't gotten tested, one I don't have any contact with. Yeah, I know I know I know. Casual sex is what got me into this mess. I should have been more careful. Thanks for the advice. I'm not sure it made me feel better, but it was real.

OK, first of all, you guys are awesome. Thank you. To provide more clarity about the situation, he's just visiting from out of town (he's in the military), so a relationship is out of the question (neither one of us believes in long distance), unfortunately. I know it might seem odd that we're talking so much, but I don't see a problem with having a casual non-casual relationship. If that makes sense. So we do want to be close to one another, but he returns home soon. Thank you for the advice about doing it in person. I will definitely take that advice. I think it will be more effective, too, now that you put it that way. Thanks for the uplifting words. I appreciate all of them. I really admire all of you and how you all seem to have the strength for this. You're my heroes! :)

Hey, everyone! One thing I really miss about my HSV negative days was not worrying so much about casual sex. Back in the day, I really felt strong, sexy, and confident - like I could just pick someone up without much effort. Now, I feel like it's gonna take a lot of persuading. I'm talking to someone right now, and we've both confessed that we have a connection and we really like each other. The last time I disclosed to someone, it was the guy who may have given it to me, and he dumped me as quick as possible. It seems like things are heading towards us hooking up. We've shared a lot of really personal information, and he seems to be very accepting and nonjudgmental. He also seems to like me a lot. But I am terrified to tell him I have HSV. Not only would it break my heart if he rejected me, but I think the possibility that someone could be so accepting and non-judgmental and STILL reject me with all my good traits and features scares the shit out of me. I'm currently deciding whether to tell him on our first date, or to just eff it and tell him while we're talking over text and sharing a bunch of personal stuff. I understand it's more traditional to disclose to someone in person, but I really don't want to waste my time or get my heart/dignity stomped on in person. Thoughts?

Thank you :)

Guys, this was so helpful. Seriously. Thank you all so much. :)

Well. THIS is fun. First of all I would like to start off by saying that I consider myself a fairly strong, positive person. I do comedy for a living, so I try to see the humor in every situation and laugh it off. I'm having a hard time doing that. I was diagnosed with oral and genital H a little over a week ago. My first OB was horrible - I was in so much pain I could barely walk, my mouth hurt like hell, and I had flu symptoms. I basically had every symptom you can have. I was a mess, too - I was crying a lot and anticipating what testing positive for H would do to change my life. The doctors visits were awful, too, because they made me wait so long for my results. The first doctor I went to told me I tested negative, which I was certain was not true, so I got a second opinion, and sure enough, I had it. On top of it all, I'd been dating someone who I'd been sleeping with for a couple of months, and things were just starting to get serious. I told him I had H, and he stopped talking to me. When I confronted him about it, he told me he just didn't feel the same, and that he couldn't imagine being intimate with me anymore. The doctor said it's likely that I got it from him since I hadn't been sleeping with anyone for a while before him, and that if he didn't have it before, he probably has it now. I told him all this, but he doesn't seem to believe me. I'm having a really hard time. I'm on medication, so I've got it under control, but I feel so disgusting and worthless. I think I have a lot to offer someone, but if just having herpes is enough to completely dismiss all of the good things about me, then I don't know how I'm ever going to find someone. I used to enjoy having casual sex, but now I don't think anyone will want that with me. Ugh, man. I'm being such a downer. Any words of wisdom, guys?