Brooke

Who would think something like a disease could make you feel so guilty. Guilty about things you have no control over anymore. Maybe I'm feeling guilty because I could have had control before. All the sex talks & condom lectures, all the "wait for the one you love" advice & here I am. Because I didn't listen to a damn thing anybody told me. I acted as if I was invincible. As if I had some kind of shield when I was using no kind of protection. I guess most of the guilt is because I am completely in love with this beautifully amazing man, & he accepts it & he loves me anyways, but it's so unfair that he has to love somebody like me.. Well not that he has to love me but if he wants to be with me, he has to deal with it. There's nothing either of us can do about it. & I feel like a selfish piece of shit for even being with him sometimes. Making love isn't the same with herpes. That's obviously not the most important thing but it definitely sucks.. I'm lucky to have somebody like him but all I can think is that maybe if I would have listened to all the lectures & the advice I would have only slept with him & I wouldn't have to deal with this bullshit. Even when he has to put on condoms I feel horrible. Is that stupid?? Sometimes it even just turns me off & I don't even want to continue because I feel so damn disgusting & dirty. I've never been so ashamed of myself in my life. I don't know I'm just hoping that he doesn't ever look at me differently, because I have no idea what I would do without him. The good news is that when I first was diagnosed, that's all I could think about. But when he's around I hardly think about it. But once in awhile, it's hard to keep your head up..

Thankyou guys!!! Well I'm trying to go to a different doctor, he might already have it from me we're not sure because we started sleeping together right before I found out I had it, then when he went to go get tested some stuff happened & he still hasn't gotten results back. So to me I feel that if he does get it at least I had the decency to tell him you know? I wish I would have known before though cause I feel horrible. I believe I had the same thing as you Emma because she gave me some kind of antibiotics & it didn't help. Because originally I just thought that everything that was going on down there was just from rough sex & I thought I had a UTI because it hurt to urinate. Then they kept telling me you have this infection & that infection but all the meds they were giving me didn't help. Then she gave me that last antibiotic because of the itching & the ydischarge & it helped the discharge kinda but not the itch. I don't understand I cannot figure out if it's from the herpes or something else. I just need to get a new doctor. One question, No more oral? At all? :( But thankyou guys for all your advice it definitely did help so glad I found this site, nice to know I'm not anywhere near alone with this.

I was just diagnosed about 2 months ago with HSV-2. I was absolutely crushed when I found out & disappointed in myself. The worst part was not knowing who gave it to me because I was told you could have it for years & not even know. So who knows who I infected & there's no way I'm gonna go to everyone I slept with in the past & tell them. that's just crazy. But anyways, everybody tells me different things about herpes & it would be helpful if somebody explained everything to me. My doctor was not helpful AT ALL. She didn't give me any kind of advice & she wouldn't prescribe me any kind of treatment or anything. I started seeing this guy right before I found out I had it. Thankfully, he doesn't mind & he still wants to be with me. But any kind of advice on keeping him safe from it would be extremely helpful. Also I've only had one outbreak but when there's no outbreak I am really, really, really itchy ... like, ridiculously itchy. When I first had my outbreak, I started putting aloe plant on it & it actually helped my outbreak go away but it doesn't work for the itch, I've also tried epsom salt baths & that didn't help either. I'm scared that if I keep itching like this it's gonna send me into another outbreak. So somebody please help me!