[10yrs post herpes diagnosis, my life is still crumbling]

I posted on another thread but thought I should add where more people can maybe get a sense of what’s happening. 
10 yrs ago I was just starting my career! I met up with an old longtime bf of mine. That’s what brought me here. I felt like it ruined my life from day one. I still worked and have had a great career, eventually having had 2 children I thought might be impossible with my diagnosis. 
over the years I have fought constant OB which just when I think might be settling move to a new area. Fast forward to now and I feel I have it all over my body. I also have always had OB on my chin since the beginning. It spread there from down there…and now it’s on my inner thigh, low back, newly on mid and upper back, tingling has started on my nose and eyebrows. I recently had an OB on my thumb. I itch everywhere…legs, back, hips, shoulders, ribs, bum, scalp. It’s for sure the ‘itch’ associated with H. 
I take daily valycyclovir, homeopathic meds for immunity, lysine. 
nothings helping its getting worse. I’ve almost left my husband as it’s too hard to bare that I can’t be intimate. Now with the facial tingling I don’t even want to kiss. I don’t want my kids touching me and I don’t want to kiss them. My hands are infected I don’t want to touch them or pick them up. 
my job has to end as I can’t risk the fact that if I can’t control it on me than I’ll more likely spread to others. 
How does one keep going after all this. My whole life is being taken from me. I’m scared every day. 
staying positive doesn’t help. As soon as I do something else comes and knocks me down. 
everything I read says it should get better. I see here for some that’s also not been true. 
I have thought it would be better and safer if I wasn’t here. My kids do bring me back but they really deserve more. More love, more affection, more safety from this being their life. After how it’s affected me I feel like I would die if they got it. 

[7 weeks pregnant, second herpes outbreak. Anyone else?]

I have had 2 babies vaginally ❤️ Outbreaks during both pregnancy and fortunately not during delivery. They are both healthy and I hope I’ve passed some antibodies their way. 

[2 years of constant herpes outbreaks please help]

I am 40 and have had GHSV for 10 years. I’ve had very frequent reoccurring BO from day one. I wanted to let my body do its job to fight it which was maybe a mistake. I started antivirals after a couple years but came off when I was pregnant with my 1st. During pregnancy and for 6 mo pp I found outbreaks were less. But came back with a vengeance. I went on again and stayed on throughout my 2nd pregnancy which I wish I didn’t for my little one. I have taken steadily since and for the last few years it’s getting far worse. It started in the genital area and now I have it everywhere. My chin which now I get bumps and tingling on my cheek, nose and eyebrow. My scalp is super itchy as well. Last year I decided to wax my low back for the 1st time and has a breakout following. It stayed itchy for what felt like was months. Now I have reg BOs there and they have moved up to mid back and recently shoulders. I feel it around my ribs, hips. I’m scratching everywhere all the time. It’s intense itching. I also had a BO on my inner thigh, my legs are constantly itching even on the lower leg and I feel like shaving has spread it all over as well. My most recent is on my thumb for past 2 weeks and I’m scared it’s more fingers. 
I’m  so depressed I have tried everything to be careful and it spreads anyway. I’m barely intimate which is causing relationship problems and has for a long time. I don’t want anyone touching me out of fear as it’s out of control on me how can I stop it to others. My work involves using my hands and now I have been forced to quit my job. I take Valcyclivir daily. I’ve tried homeopathy and lysine and essential oils. 
I consider how it would be safer for everyone if I wasn’t here. I love my kids and I can’t bare this anymore. I’m terrified. I’m lost. I can’t take much more. Just when I try to be strong it rips me down again. 
Thanks for listening and I wanted to share I’m in the same boat that it’s getting worse.