[Positive]

On 9/26/2022 at 10:32 AM, njosnavelin said:

Hi there,

I also was just diagnosed with genital herpes this month. I understand the stories going through your mind especially with early sexual abuse (this happened to me too). When you are working so hard to fight those stories of feeling unlovable, feeling that the only way you can be loved is due to sex - getting herpes is like a cherry on top to a really bad narrative.

The guy who gave it to me dumped me after I very nicely told him (and did not blame him) only to find out through my antibody tests that it was absolutely recent and from him (I had not slept with anyone else in many months). So it's hypocritical rejection. And we used condoms too.

My victim mindset can't help but feel this is my fate. I had just started to feel comfortable with sex this year and feeling liberated and sexy, etc - then this.

Please know you are not alone. And that these stories and narratives we tell ourselves are not true. Our self-worth is much beyond this skin condition and I encourage you to dig into those things that bring you joy.

Herpes does not cause cancer. It is not dangerous. It's an annoyance. I found it helpful to keep this perspective in mind. We all will deal with health issues at some point in life - this one is not physically damaging, just psychologically. The good news is that we can change the way our minds think about this. Definitely seek therapy as I think it's a great outlet and professionals will help you work through the transition.

My friends who have gotten hsv said their first 6 months were rough mentally, but eventually they let go and it's not a big deal anymore. There are plenty of successful relationships ahead of you.

Thank you so much for sharing this. I just found out I got hsv1 and test results show that it’s a recent infection like yours. The guy also bailed after he infected me. We also used condoms.  I’ve been crying, feel like my life is over. The psychological battle is tough. I come from a very cultural family so I don’t feel comfortable sharing this with them, which makes it all the more isolating. I’m so scared about what dating will look like going forward. I want to fall in love, get married, and have children. Right now it seems impossible. I’m shattered. Feels like my life is over. I have the same victim mentality you did. I hope to one day get to where you are mentally. 

[Looking for support]

4 hours ago, Seeker1960 said:

Hi @GH is not the end I know that getting the diagnosis that you have GHSV can be very unsettling. Glad the you contacted the Suicide hotline because you have a lot to live for. This virus is an inconvenience that can be manages.It is not a life ending illness. It will take a while for the antibodies to develop to the point that you can find out which type of HSV you have. It is most like HSV1. I received it also believing I was being careful. I'm not sure if I got it through oral or through intercourse. 

Your life is not over just different. Get educated about what HSV is and what is isn't. For some the symptoms a few and far in between. Stress can trigger symptoms as well as anything that weakens the immune system.

You can still get married and have kids not to worry. Read on this forum of how many people got married or people who had kids after. Quite a number. Just be aware that you can pass this on to someone especially after a recent infection and that you need to take precautions not to do that. Learn more and you will be fine.

Thank you so much. It’s truly been a difficult experience for me both physically and emotionally. This primary outbreak has been gruesome. It’s good to know that others have had their lives go on. I will read more posts in the forums and learn more about this virus. 

[Looking for support]

I have GH and I’m devastated. I’ve been having symptoms for the last 10 days. It’s been excruciating. I went to urgent care and the doctor took one look at the lesions and said it’s definitely herpes. 
 

I also have Candida. My blood work for IGG came back negative. I’m waiting for the swab and igm results which I know what will say. 
 

I’m devastated to say the least. Been crying and having suicidal thoughts (even contacted the suicide crisis line). Genuinely feels like my life is over. I tried to be safe. I received oral once and I’m sure that’s how I got it because outside of that I always use protection. 

I worry about how GH will affect my dating life moving forward. I want to have children and get married and I’m scared that’s not a possibility anymore. I also want to enjoy sex (and oral) and I’m scared I never will (and can never have oral). It truly feels like my life is over. I just don’t know how to move forward. 
 

Looking for assurance and support.