Lj-broken

@AnnieOthank you for your message. However people telling me that I will get rejection is unfortunately not something I am strong enough to cope with. I am not willing to deal with a difficult miserable life. I don’t feel any sense of hope when I read how often people are rejected and shamed.

@Sunnygurl thank you for your message. I’m sorry you are in similar place. You do have so much more chance of being happy than I do as you’re still young. I hope you’re okay. Stay strong. I know how hard it is.

The problem isn’t my acceptance as such. It’s the fact no one else will accept it and will reject me. I just can’t handle it. I believe my ex gave this to me and has now ditched me like I am nothing and ruined my life. I don’t know how to cope with this. I feel like I’ll never be happy again. I know no one will accept this about me and I have so much wrong with me why would anyone want me. I am getting too old to have a chance to meet anyone and have kids. Even without this diagnosis I couldn’t find someone to be with. And when I did find the one, I got this and it made him leave me. I literally have no one I can talk to or who understands. Everyone who has the virus just tells me I will be okay and find someone because they did. But they aren’t me. They haven’t had my experience with relationships. And I just know. I cannot handle the rejection of sharing this with anyone. I am sorry this is such self pity but I need to express myself and let it out. I just want to die. I can’t live like this. also my dr said that I have to wait for another outbreak or two before having the suppression therapy. And she said that it becomes less effective over time so it’s better I don’t go on it.

I feel so lonely. I feel like I can’t talk to anyone as I’ll be judged and rejected.

I was diagnosed just over 3 weeks ago. The day before my birthday. And then my partner left me on my birthday. I have been feeling suicidal about it all. Not only the diagnosis but the break up and being rejected on top of it. I could have coped with the diagnosis of my partner stayed with me. I am trying to get counselling but I still feel like I’ll never be able to cope with this and feel like the only option is ending my life. I know no one will ever want me now. I have always found it hard to find a relationship and now even harder. I’m not going to be able to find someone and have kids. I honestly don’t think I can cope anymore. All I want is to be loved by someone and accepted for who I am but now I have no chance as I already have so many things wrong with me. I trusted him with my life and now proves I can’t trust anyone. If he rejected me, anyone will. I find it so hard to find a good connection with someone. I just don’t want to live anymore. also my dr won’t give me suppressive therapy despite being immunosuppressed.