Alie34

And remember don't beat yourself over it if he changes his mind. I read somewhere once that H is like your wingman and I have totally embraced that. Whoever rejects you because of that and not see who you truly are as a person doesn't deserve you!

I got the virus from an ex that had it and never told me about it, it came out of his mouth after I was diagnosed, with the whole spiel of its very common blah bla... So the whole time I was in severe pain during my first outbreak he just stayed quite. I could never forgive him after that, he chose for me and didn't give me the option. I know it's hard to disclose especially if you really like the person but if that person really likes you and aren't in for just a fling, they will accept you. I've always been honest in disclosing because I can't have them go through what I did. And if I get rejected that tells me right there that they weren't in it for the same reasons as me. You know hsv2 thought me so much about myself and I came to accept it and be ok with it. Don't beat yourself over this, just learn from this mistake and move on.

Hi all, I've been an hsv2 carrier for 5yrs now. About 6yrs ago I dated this guy for a few months but had to end it because he had to relocate for his job. He kept contact with me throughout the years and when he found out that his job was relocating him back to my area, he contacted me and asked to see me. I've blown him off from a year because I felt embarrassed disclosing to someone I dated before, that I got hsv the time we've been apart. Somehow he kept coming back, didn't give up, so I decided to give it a shot because I'm still attracted to him and have a lot in common and I can't let H interfere in my life. We've been dating for about a month now and everything has been great. So I decided that yesterday was the day to disclose! I started my usual disclosure talk and told him that I carry hsv2, he then said that's ok and asked how I felt when I was diagnosed. I told him that I felt betrayed and ashamed but after reading and learning about it, it's so very common and gave him the statistics and he said yeah, a lot of people have it. What I feel weird about is that usually when I disclosed before, they were more curious and asked questions and also comforting but this time it felt like he brushed it off. We continued the evening like normal, but the energy around us felt weird. I don't know if I'm overthinking about this but would appreciate comments from people that had similar experience when they disclosed.

I did it!! He came over that evening and started by telling him that I've been holding something inside and I've been waiting for the right time. I also told him that I want to be honest and don't want to hold anything from him and that I feel safe to be vulnerable in front of him. I then told him about my hsv2 status.. I told him how my ex didn't tell me he had it and passed the virus to me, I gave him all the stats and gave him the chance to walk away if he wanted and that if he did I'd understand. I then said that if he stayed I promised that I'd do everything in my power to keep him protected. He could tell I was upset and hurt and he held my hands tightly throughout the conversation. He was even chocked up a little. He then said that he wants to read about it and get educated. However it didn't change anything between us. He thanked me for being so honest and said that he has a new level of respect for me. After he left I felt relieved as if a lump has gone from my stomach, I was worried that he'd change his mind but yesterday he was normal and sweet as always and today we spent an amazing evening together. H was never part of the subject and I'm truly happy that he saw me for who I am and didn't let my silly skin condition come between us. He's an amazing man and I just couldn't be happier that he came into my life.... He's definitely a keeper!! Thank you so much for all those stories, if it wasn't for this website I would still be in the closet. I can now be happy, with a man that's crazy about me and I'm crazy about him. Thank you and I'll keep you posted as weeks progress. I might need to start a new thread under the successful disclosures.

Thank you so much for the helpful information. I've been doing lots of research and read those already. I'm planning to see him tonight and will be disclosing to him... Wish me luck

Hello all, First of all I have to say what a great site. I find this so helpful to read everyone's stories and related to them. I have hsv2 and was diagnosed 2 1/2yrs ago. I got it from my then boyfriend that knew he had but didn't tell me and apparently he was shedding the virus and eventhough we used protection I got it. I was devastated and thought my life was over. After seeing that it's not as bad as people made it sound (only get 1 ob per year maybe) I came to conclusion that this isn't as bad... Actually there's times that it doesn't cross my mind the thought that I have it. Anyways I did disclose to 2 guys before and one accepted me which we broke up for other reasons and the other didn't want to take the risk. I've now met this amazing guy and we've been dating for a few weeks and are exclusive to eachother, he's everything I've ever wanted in a man and he's head over heels for me. He keeps telling me he's in this for the long haul and isn't going anywhere. Yesterday he told me how happy he is and how great it is for him to be able to just be himself around me and that torn me up inside as I really want to tell him so bad because I feel that I'm keeping this from him. I haven't been able to tell him just yet because the environment hasn't been appropriate, I don't want to tell him at a restaurant or a bar where there's loud music. I definatley have to tell him this week either Saturday (invited him for a night in) or during the week he might be coming over. The thing is I'm mortified, I am most probably going to cry because I'm so scared that he's going to walk away. Now I need help as to how I should start the subject. I know I'm going to tell him that I want to be honest with him and that I love what we have and I want to see it going further plus I feel safe to be vulnerable in front of him. Then I'm stuck as to how to tell him and I need help badly. I know I want to tell him that there's 2 types and the difference between them, that it's a skin condition and it really isn't as bad as the stigma is out there. I also want to tell him the numbers and want him to know that he's safe with me as I'll do anything to keep him safe. Btw I get 1ob with anti virals... With acyclovir I don't get any at all. Please help me as I'm really scared that he might judge me and think that I'm promiscuous. Sorry for the long post and any help will be much appreciated. Alie