BreeBree92

Thanks so much for all your advice, I really appreciate it. I'll keep you posted for sure. Bree

No, my doctor prescribed the cimetidine because I told her about studies where it cleared herpes and reduced outbreaks, but also because I have gerd, not peptic ulcers. I had an endoscopy done to confirm that. They swabbed my throat when I was 14 for herpes/ strep and they said it was herpes, but, I'm still pending the blood tests. Also, my bf hasn't been tested because I'm the only person he's been with (supposedly) but I think it'd be good to get tested just in case I gave it to him. I like my doctor and she's very knowledgable it's just she doesn't specialize in herpes, but I don't want to change. She said she's open to other possibilities if everything continues coming back negative. Thank you for the support

I've been going crazy washing my hands, using non-latex gloves when I'm applying medications, using hand sanitizer every five seconds. Ugh. It's just so frustrating. And you're right, it's not the right terminology to be using, but that's just how I feel right now. I feel like I've been plagued with an incurable disease that has the ability to take away my self-confidence, my vision and my sanity. I'm going nuts. I'm super worried that my boyfriend and I are going to have issues in the future because of our long distance relationship and I won't be able to find anyone else because I never have been in the past. I had to go online to find a boyfriend, which to me, was one of the best things that could've happened, but it feels pathetic. Ugh. And yeah, I'm almost positive the stuff in my throat was Herpes. I get the same thing on the inside of my lips and it was what my boyfriend had going on. I guess I've just been calling them canker sores, but, they're most likley HSV1. It looked the exact same as what's going on down there right now. There have been a lot of visual diagnosis going on, but, there's also not much else that appears in that way with open lesions down there, though I did bring up the possibility of having a silicone allergy with my doc which she said may be possible if I don't have any more outbreaks. But that's the thing, if I have HSV1 down there from the sore on his lip, the antibody test isn't going to distinguish between the HSV that I get in my mouth and the HSV that's down there unless there's two different types. So really, I have no accurate way of knowing unless they do another swab if I have another outbreak. Right now, I'm taking cimetidine (a GERD med that's been shown to reduce outbreaks), acyclovir suppressive therapy, and L-lysine... I'd like this shit to go away and stay that way. lol

I have had a swab that came back negative, but my doctor said it sounded like they tested too early. I had an antibody test, but, it's going to come back positive anyhow because they swabbed for herpes in the back of my throat. And HSV can cause canker sores, which is what my doctor told me. Maybe she's wrong? But, either way. I have HSV 1 because I get cold sores. Swabs and blood tests for herpes are VERY often false results and are inaccurate, unfortunately :/ The bumps in the back of my throat also come in outbreaks, just like herpes. I've had a full panel and everything has come negative! And, my boyfriend was a virgin when we met. Sooo yeahhh... Doctors are pretty sure, unfortunately. :(

Well... Here goes. I'm new here. I just found out two weekends ago that I (potentially.... I'm still grasping for hope.. though two different doctors said it looked like I had the big H) have herpes. Over these last two weeks my anxiety has me doing somersaults through life and it sucks. So here's what happened: My boyfriend and I have been very happy these last two and a half years, with the exception of a slight hiccup last May. We met online and we're long distance, so he only comes to visit once every three months or so. But, we need to rewind about 7 years. I was 14. And reader beware... there's going to be dirty deets. It was all the rage to have sex in middle school, don't you know? Well, I was promiscuous. I had sex with a few people who's name I had just began to allow to roll off of the tip of my tongue... some who didn't even speak the same language as me. Well, their name wasn't the only thing I allowed to roll off of my tongue. Two weeks later, I couldn't eat. I was on a fully liquid diet because the thought of food scraping those definite white strep bumps was horrifying. It got to the point where I couldn't stand the pain anymore.. Off to the E.R. I go. 14, scared that I had strep throat and I would have to miss school until I was better.. Until I heard those three little words. "You have herpes." Um... come again? It's white bumps... down my throat.... you're stupid.. this is strep. No. Nonononnonononono. It was herpes. I had to go to class... bumps and all. "Why aren't you eating lunch, Bree?" "Oh.. I'm not hungry." Nobody could ever find out. Flash forward 4 years. I wasn't exactly the prettiest barbie in the toybox. Sad, hurt, worried I would miss the one thing every girl dreams about. Prom night, right? Well.. no.. for most it's marriage... but... I was excited about prom. I just had nobody to take me... so.. I resorted to the interwebs. And then we met. My boyfriend has been one of the best people I could possibly ask for in everything I do. 8 years older than me... so I missed my prom because the school had rules against that. But, whatever. That dreaded day came, however. The day when I had to disclose. I was pretty nonchalant though.. "Hey so yeah, just thought I'd let you know... sometimes I get these weird canker sores down my throat." If you're smart... put two and two together. It's the herpderp. His response "Oh... Alright. I sometimes get canker sores too." Oh... cool. Well..... so... he accepts me even with all of my flaws and I thank him for that. Skip forward to two weeks ago. Things were hot and heavy. We rented a hotel room, like we always do when he comes up for our mini vacations. We were lip locking and touching and all of the good stuff.. well... we forgot he had one of these said canker sores. And he went to the nether regions of my body..... And well... that was that. Two days of hot steamy sex later... ow. Why is my clit so sensitive? Must have been the rough sex we had mixed with overstimulation... but what explains these two little bumps? That's when the siren went off in my head. Let's go to breakfast before you take me to the E.R., babe. I don't want to starve before finding out bad news. "Well... that looks like it might be the start of a herpes outbreak." The tears started welling and the anxiety ran high as I looked up at my supportive boyfriend's face.... The thing running through my head "Pleasedon'tleavepleasedon'tgoawaypleasestaywithmepleasegoddon'tgo." He stayed. He promised he would. He held me and took another vacation day to be by my side.... He spent $1500 that weekend just to be here and turned right around the next weekend and spent another $500 or so to be with me again because I feel like he's the only thing that can calm my nerves. I've started coming to terms with this awful disease... but my anxiety flares at the sight of what might even be a red mark..... I'm so concerned I'll transmit it to my eye... my hand... my legs... I'm a huge ball of stress and I can't even begin to stop crying. I saw a red bump next to my eye and flew in to my doctor. "Bree, honey, calm down. It's a red mark from overly stressing and rubbing your eyes. That looks nothing like ocular herpes." Ugh. Well, I guess that's my story, thus far. Will the anxiety ever stop?